Whistling in the Dark

New Site!

2010-03-13T18:39:00.002-06:00

I'm switching publishing software and domain names. You can now find me at Adventures of an Urban Housewife. Adjust your links accordingly and then come on over for exciting adventures in Kirsten-land.

Modern Woman

2010-03-11T08:01:00.003-06:00

I was thinking about this recently and maybe when I don't have a baby demanding all my attention, I will talk more about it, but here is a poem I wrote junior year of college. Ages ago.

Do you see me? I live, unashamedly, with my boyfriend

In a shabby apartment with two cats - I never do dishes

My hands turn bright radish red and burn when I scrub

The remnants crusting along the bottom of pots, bowls.

I learned how to knit this weekend - I've always known

I think, something ingrained in my fingers which proved

Unsuited for musical instruments, a failure at violin

Barely passable at piano, enough for a girl like me.

I was never meant to have a 4.0, never meant to go to

This school, I've been found to be unoriginal

Not remotely interesting. I was meant to make small talk with

A cocktail in one hand while my husband made business deals.

I bake cookies, brownies and muffins for fun instead of

Reading Nabokov or learning about Attitudes Based on

High Consumer Effort - I prefer to sew, knit, embroider

While watching TLC's Trading Spaces.

I think I will be a housewife when I grow up - marketing

Is not for me. I will put up with dishpan hands, clean up

After two cats and send three kids to school, hoping they will

Do something with their lives - I will become my mother.

Four Months: Addendum

2010-03-09T16:08:00.002-06:00

Look who's eating solid foods! Day one with the baby cereal resulted mostly in stuff running out of Lorelei's mouth, but she seems to like it so far.

Four Months

2010-03-08T20:46:00.002-06:00

Dear Lorelei,

Another month has gone by too quickly. And I know what you're going to say: of course it went by too fast, it was February and there are only twenty-eight days (twenty-nine if it's a Leap Year) in February. Well, Miss Smartypants, you are correct but that doesn't change the fact that it feels like time is speeding by at a record pace.

You've started this month out with a bang. Or should I say a scream. As in, you spent all of this afternoon and evening screaming because you got your shots today. Can we talk about how upsetting that is for poor mommy?

You've gotten so big, although you are still so small. Eleven whole pounds and one ounce, not quite double what you weighed when you were born. You can sit up now, albeit with someone or something propping you up, but you don't lean over to the side as much anymore. You can push yourself up when you're on your tummy and scoot yourself just a fraction of an inch in the direction you want to go. You've gotten so strong that you can pull your elephant toy to make it play without any help. Sometimes, I'll be sitting here typing away and I'll be surprised by the sudden music. This morning you detached your zebra (still your favorite toy) from not only the gym but also its ring.

Littlest girl, time may be going by so quickly, but there are days when it feels like you've always been here. The perfect completion of our little family. Just do me a favor and don't grow up too fast, I still like snuggling in bed with you.

Love always,

Your Mother

You Know You've Been Projecting Your Bad Mood When...

2010-03-07T11:32:00.003-06:00

...You go to the same coffee shop (or in this case, tea room) two days in a row and the staff comments on how much more chipper you are than usual.

---

It was one of those moments that made me realize how much I just need to snap out of it. Sure, some days still suck a lot, but I've got it really good. I have a husband who not only will take over baby care for a few hours so I can relax, but actually offers. I got to go out, drink copious amounts of iced tea, eat the largest slice of devil's food cake known to man, and relax in the most comfy armchairs ever manufactured. I would seriously consider breaking in one day just so I could steal these chairs, take them home with me and then park my butt on them for all eternity.

Today, I feel better. Perhaps fueled by caffeine and a maple log from Quik Trip. Perhaps because I went to church for the first time in weeks. Perhaps because I have gotten multiple nights of halfway decent sleep in a row. Or perhaps its just because of this:

Because I am a Geek.

2010-03-06T11:58:00.002-06:00

I think most of you have probably seen one or both (looking at you Kate!) of these, but I'm geeking out over here and had to share. Watch and enjoy.

You Say Hoosier Like It's a Bad Thing

2010-03-05T08:23:00.003-06:00

hoosier: n. any awkward, unsophisticated person, especially a rustic.

---

I'm not sure if this is always true; but here in St Louis, you aren't a redneck, you're a hoosier. And we don't mean a person from Indiana. That's Hoosier, with a capital H.

I never claimed to be elegant and sophisticated. I enjoy a disgusting fast food hamburger as much as a nice dinner at the Melting Pot.

Okay. That's not entirely true. I enjoy the Melting Pot far more; however, there are days when only a Steakburger from Stack 'n Shack will satisfy. And I draw the line at White Castle. I will never ever eat there again after they gave me cheese fries when I asked for a Sprite. No lie. And it was gross.

But the day I realized I might be a bit of a hoosier was when we put the plastic over our windows.

The joy of living in a hundred-year old house - in addition to the fact that it leans slightly to one side - is the complete lack of insulation. Seriously. Put your hand against one of the walls and you can feel how cold it is outside. Oh and the rehabbers who did such a wonderful job (sarcasm) also didn't put up double-paned windows, they stuck with the cheap and single-paned job that has probably been up for many many years. Um, hi. We live in a city which reaches the single digits in the winter and the triple digits in the summer, are you idiots?

Well, we haven't been able to replace them yet because there were more pressing concerns - ie the cracked joists in our roof and the crumbling chimneys - but we had to come up with some sort of temporary solution so we didn't freeze in the winter or run up a ridiculous electric bill. Hence the plastic sheets. They work. Really. Unfortunately, our basement/bedroom window was too cold to adhere directly to the window itself, so it is attached to the wall. Also, unfortunately, I have dumb cats. Who tried to jump up there and punched a hole in the plastic. Did we put up a new sheet? No, we fixed it with duct tape.

Okay, maybe when we fixed it with duct tape did I realize we were a hoosiers. But that's not a bad thing. And at least Brian doesn't mow the lawn in nothing but a wife beater and jorts like our neighbor. Now that's hoosier.

A Reminder

2010-03-03T20:47:00.004-06:00

It is worth it.

Every bad day.

Every day when it feels like I'm never going to get this right. Every day when she just cries and cries and I don't know why.

Even though her cries make my heart hurt, I know it's not (usually) my fault.

When she smiles. Or laughs. Or gurgles. Or grabs hold of me.

She is worth it.

---

And my week started out so well. I was very productive Monday morning. Went out to lunch with the hubby and then did my weekly Target run out in Brentwood. (Why am I driving twenty minutes when there are two Targets closer to my house? Because this one has a real grocery section and everything is cheaper than Schnuck's) This weeks meals were planned and purchased.

Tuesday morning was okay too. This is probably the most progress I've made on my weekly to do list in awhile. But oh dear Lord! Tuesday afternoon sucked the big one. Little peanut would not nap. She was tired. And at first I thought she was going to be real good because it only took about 15 minutes to get her calmed down for her nap; however, the second I had finished up the last few things I wanted to do and then lay down for my nap, she woke up with a vengeance. She was still tired, but no amount of coaxing would convince her to go back to sleep. So she was a whiny crankypants all afternoon and into the early evening.

And then she spent an hour and a half screaming at the top of her lungs when it was time for bed. There didn't seem to be anything wrong - no fever or anything like that - but she refused to eat and refused to be put down. I know this happens sometimes and you just have to ride it out, but I was in tears thinking I was a horrible mother.

So I'm reminding myself how much this little girl is worth it.

Because she is.

Potty Mouth

2010-03-02T09:47:00.001-06:00

Question: What is your policy on swearing in front of your children?

---

I don't know when it happened, but somewhere along the line, I became a potty mouth. There are times when I swear like a sailor on leave. I didn't use to. At least, I don't think I did. In high school, in addition to being a goody-goody straight A student, I was like the tamest, most well-behaved teenager on the planet. Or, at least, that's how I remember it, my parents may disagree. But I never swore and I would feel embarrassed when I heard other people swearing. What the shit happened?

Now, I have to make a conscious effort to not swear. I let pretty much everything else slide, but the one thing I'm trying to never say in front of my daughter is the F-word. I have slipped once or twice, when I fell out of the rocking chair and took the skin of my knee or when I got cut off by some stupid bitch on her cellphone who didn't see her exit. Those are the two most recent incidents that I can think of.

I've been told not to worry about it too much since she isn't talking yet, can't repeat what I say and doesn't even understand it yet. And while Brian hopes her first words are "demon bear", I live in fear that her first words will be "Why are you driving like a douchebag?"

I also worry that, once she's in school, she will say something along the lines of, "Two plus two is four, BITCHES!" And then we'll be called into the principal's office for a talking to. The scenario I have in my head is this: because our daughter is such a potty mouth I will have to organize a bake sale (I don't know how this relates to swearing, but my mind works in mysterious ways). Do you know what I would say?

"I will organize the shit out of a bake sale, BITCHES!"

Oh crap.

Hello March!

2010-03-01T21:14:00.002-06:00

Apparently I'm not the only person who has a bad relationship with February.

But February is finally over and March is here! Let the rejoicing begin!

Spring is right around the corner; although, I'm sure St Louis will fuck me over with a freak snow storm in April like it usually does. And that means Spring clothes. Much as I love my sweaters, I can't wait to wear t-shirts again. I can't wait to take a brisk walk around the "lake" in Carondelet Park. I can't wait to go to the Botanical Gardens while things are blooming and go to the zoo while the animals aren't hiding from the cold.

It is time to shake off the crap that has been the first two months of this year. This is what I get to look forward to this month:

Lorelei is four months old. FOUR! What the crap?
Brian turns 30. THIRTY! Such an old man.
Spring cleaning. Time to get rid off all of that stuff I don't need. Which means...

Nothing like casting off all the crap and giving the house a thorough cleaning to make you feel better. Plus, you get to help people too.

P.S. March also means baseball season is only one month away! Squee!

Positive Thoughts for this Week

2010-02-27T11:38:00.003-06:00

I think February hates me. For serious.

It seems like every year, around this time, I go through a really down period. Everything sucks. Even when good things are going on, it still feels like it sucks. So, once again, I bring you the good things that happened to Kirsten this week:

1. I bought a pink purse from Target. My weakness for accessories is well-known and although I shouldn't have, I did. I actually saw it and told myself that if I still wanted it after I had finished my real shopping, I could get it. How can you say no to a pink purse? It screams, Spring is here! And when winter has sucked as much as mine, that is exactly what I needed.

2. Tahitian Twist from Benton Park Cafe. Three Olives Espresso Vodka in a blended vanilla latte. Party in my mouth!

3. I made chili. At six in the morning. Mostly because I couldn't go back to sleep. But since I did it while the rest of the house was asleep, there were no interruptions and it had a good long time to sit and let all the flavors marry and become delicious. As we all know, reheated chili is the best kind.

4. I have decided to purge my closets. If anyone in the St Louis area (or hell, even if you aren't, I can mail things) is interested in gently used clothes (medium, 10-12 and some large sizes), shoes (size 8) and bags let me know. You can have whatever you like before I take them to either the thrift store - if they aren't douche canoes like they usually are and actually take my clothes - or Goodwill.

5. Finally finished The Help. I know I normally do a separate book post, but I don't feel like it this week. Let's just say I really enjoyed it and recommend to anyone who hasn't already read it.

Okay. That's all for now. Back to work on my Slytherin scarf for husband

For Sale

2010-02-24T06:16:00.002-06:00

For Sale: One old life, slightly used. Includes outfits that were barely worn and a degree that was never used. Slightly damaged but in good condition.

---

AndreAnna was talking yesterday on her blog about living simpler. She's preparing to move halfway across the country, so downsizing her stuff makes sense. I don't have the excuse of a move, but I do have a need to do the same.

I look around my house and I see so many things that I just don't need anymore. I have business suits and blazers, dress pants and nice tops from my brief stint as a shift supervisor. If it hadn't been for a craptacular shift of doom and me being blamed entirely for it and then, without being told, no longer scheduled for those shifts, I might still be at that job. I might still have a use for all those nice clothes. But where would I use them now? Part of me wants to hang onto them in the hope that maybe one day I will figure out what it is I want to do and return to work. Deep down, however, I know that I won't. I never want to work a soul crushing job ever again; be it shift supervisor at a restaurant or lowly office drone.

Then there is everything else. A random collection of stuff that I don't really need. Books and movies I will never read or watch again no matter how much I liked them. Crappy fleece blankets, old pillows, boxes of mystery items that have been unopened since our move four years ago.

I wish someone would come into my house and do the purging for me. I won't be able to do it myself because I will always come up with some lame excuse for keeping things. But I don't need them.

I don't need all this stuff.

I Can't

2010-02-23T09:52:00.002-06:00

I promised myself that I would try not to be so negative this week.

Today I can't.

I just can't.

Trivia Nights are Serious Business

2010-02-22T09:08:00.005-06:00

I have never been a social butterfly. Do people still use that term? I prefer a quiet night in with a book and my husband, snuggling in bed. Or sipping a glass of wine and watching a movie. I used to go out more. Not just before the baby was born, it has been several years. Going out after a long shift at [redacted] was just what we did. Myself and the other servers would go to Growlers and drink beer or go to Houlihan's (classy, eh?) and have martinis. But then I got married. My close friends who I worked with there moved away and I didn't much feel like going out without them. Then I changed jobs and was up at 3:45 in the morning four or five days a week and on the days when I didn't have to get up early the next morning I was too exhausted to do anything else.

Hell must have frozen over because I had not one, not two, but three things planned for this weekend.

Friday evening, my friend Desiree invited me out for dinner and drinks at the Scottish Arms since she had an online friend (see it can be done!) visiting from out of town. Husband stayed home with baby and I went out hoping to have a good time. Which I did. Black and Tans make everything better. And so do pasties (and by pasties, I don't mean the things strippers wear to cover their nipples). Afterwards, we headed out to the City Museum. I apologize to my non-St Louis readers that I didn't bring my camera so you all could know what I'm talking about, but think giant playground. Somewhere in one of the tunnels when my knees started hurting, I realized that I'm getting far too old for this. It's fun and there is booze (although I didn't have any this time) but the next several days when your shins and elbows are entirely bruises it's hard to remember how fun it was.

Of course, when Momma's away, baby is cranky. She woke up four times Friday night, so in addition to being sore and slightly headachy from the two drinks I had the night before, I was also exhausted. But Saturday means Knitty Knerds day! Myself and my ~~old lady~~ young and hip knitting friends gather and work on our various projects of the yarn variety. I finally finished my Christmas presents this week. And only two months late! We also enjoyed the wonderfully terribleness that is Ella Enchanted. That's right, I like cheesy chick flicks. Anyone have a problem with that?

Saturday evening was event number three. I told you there were three things! My friend's fiancé was turing 32, that old man, so she arranged a surprise for him which was a whole group of us going to a trivia night at the Botanical Gardens. Now, I don't know about other parts of the country, but here in St Louis, trivia nights are serious business. Everyone is super competitive and usually everyone goes all out bringing their own food and wine. (Because of a contract the gardens have with a catering company, outside food was not allowed, but a delicious buffet and Schlafly beer was provided.) I am convinced that the table that won was a bunch of cheaters since they got way too many questions right considering how hard some of them were, but we came in a respectable fifth out of twenty. Not too shabby. Plus there were mustaches:

That is my dear friend Meredith's husband. I hope he doesn't mind that I posted this picture for all of the internet to see.

Technically I had a fourth thing planned for Sunday - going to see Shutter Island - but I was so exhausted I could barely move yesterday. I didn't manage to be upright for more than fifteen minutes at a time until about 5:30 that evening. Despite the tiredness and the still massively bruised body parts, I had a really great time and I hope the awesomeness will extend to this week. I would really like to make it through one week that doesn't suck total ass.

On the Road to Positivity

2010-02-19T14:41:00.003-06:00

I am trying.

I am trying to be positive.

Life has really been getting me down recently. For a lot of reasons. Reasons that I am somewhat reluctant to discuss in such a public forum.

Let's just say, things in the financial area have been going really badly. I thought we had sorted it out, but it turns out we didn't. I hate mortgage lenders. That extra income you need from us would require me to go back to work full time which means we would have to get full time child care which means that extra income doesn't do us any good.

Our chimney was finally fixed today. But it turns out the second chimney was in even worse shape. There's another chunk of money we don't have gone.

I've been sick. Brian's been sick. He whines like a little girl when he's sick and it annoys me. He gets a break from everything because he gets to go to work. Where he can close the door and not actually do any work at all if he wants. I don't get a break. I have to drag my sick-ass out of bed and take care of another human being all day long. I love her so I don't really mind, but it is exhausting and I never really get a chance to get healthy again.

I'm overwhelmed. I feel like crying all the time. But I am attempting to be positive. I'm on my way. I will focus on the things that make me happy. Like the fifteen minutes I get to myself driving out to Starbucks for a Caramel Apple Spice (What can I say? I'm obsessed). Or reading a really good book. Or this adorable hat that I just received in the mail:

Seriously. Been coveting this since before Lorelei was born.

This weekend I have plans. Substantial ones for the first time in three-plus months. Tonight is dinner out with the girls at the Scottish Arms. Beer! And tomorrow is super secret surprise for friend's fiancé's birthday. Maybe a good weekend will help me on my road to positivity.

How to Make Friends...

2010-02-17T16:09:00.001-06:00

...or, could someone please tell me how to make friends cause I suck at it?

This post has been kicking around in my brain for the last week, which might have something to do with my rather light posting recently. But ever since my mini-breakdown last Monday night - trust me, you don't want to know the details - this is something that has really been bothering me.

At the risk of sounding all woe-is-me-my-life-sucks-so-much: I am a terrible friend. Well, terrible at keeping friends. I hate to text. I hate to talk on the phone. And I am probably the worst person to send an e-mail to since I always forget to reply. Thank goodness for things like Facebook and Twitter but even with the wonders of modern technology, I still suck at it. It's a great way to sorta kinda know what people who I used to be much closer with are up to these days but it also makes me feel extremely guilty for not keeping in better touch with everyone. If you don't live in the same city as me, it is quite possible that we aren't going to keep in touch and if you do live in the same city, there is still no guarantee. There are friends of mine who I rarely see and when I do it is never planned. For example, I was at that mall and saw that my friend Sarah had started working at [redacted] again and I had no clue.

Or here's another thing, seeing that a guy I had a crush on in high school (if you're reading this, Hi Aaron!) is facebook friends with my brother and then I got all weird and self-conscious and fretted for three days about whether or not I should friend him because even though we're both married with kids I still felt like that awkward fourteen year old and worried that he would deny my friend request. Or that he would think I was some kind of weird stalker loser. I don't know how to start talking to him again but I would really like to because, hey he has kids too and maybe that would make me feel less totally weird about having a baby.

That's another thing. I have started to feel increasingly more isolated now that I've had Lorelei. Not because I don't have really great friends who are incredibly eager to help me out in anyway that they can, but I don't have anyone I'm really close to who is also a mother - since I can't really count my best friend from elementary school since she lives all the way in England now. I really wish there was someone out there either here or on the interwebs that I could connect with. Who would say, "Yeah, sometimes parenthood sucks but it's going to get better." I don't know how to go about making friends with people on-line. I know there are people out there who do it but I don't get it. Should I keep commenting on their blogs and twitter and hope that maybe one day they'll notice me and say, "You seem not loser-y at all. Let's be friends." I want that.

Okay, yeah. It's taken me a whole day to write this and now I feel weird so if you've stuck with me through the end of this, suggestions are welcome.

Big Girl

2010-02-15T15:39:00.002-06:00

I'm A Badass

2010-02-14T08:21:00.003-06:00

Well, not really. But I do have those songs that when they start playing on iTunes that I what to put on my knee-high boots and a leather jacket and start kicking ass. Songs that scream, "Time to wear ridiculous amounts of leather!" Here are my songs:

1. "Sabotage" by The Beastie Boys: Do I really need to explain this one?

2. "Love Me Dead" by Ludo: This song can be described best by one single line, "You're hideous and sexy!"

3. "Supermassive Black Hole" by Muse: I would like to thank Guitar Hero for introducing me to this band. This song is actually what inspired this post.

4. "The Little Things" by Danny Elfman: Ah Wanted! It was a horrible and yet delightfully fun movie. And who knew Danny Elfman could sing?

5. "Short Skirt/Long Jacket" by Cake: No explanation necessary.

6. "Get Out of My Way" by Cowboy Mouth: It's a shame that there are only two original members left in this band, it used to be one of the best live concerts out there. This song still kicks ass though!

7. "Fat-Bottomed Girls" by Queen: We make the rocking world go 'round.

There's my short list of bad ass songs. What are yours?

This Week in Books 2/3-2/11

2010-02-12T10:24:00.002-06:00

So this week was basically sucktacular and my reading time severely limited. I did, however, manage to finish one book. Quickly, before little bit decides she needs my full and undivided attention (Just as I wrote this sentence, she crapped her pants. My life is awesome!):

Shades of Grey: The Road to High Saffron

By Jasper Fforde

Pages: 390

If you have read any Jasper Fforde - by the way, how the heck do you pronounce that, is it like Smith or something, silly Welshmen - I guarantee you will like this. Man I love me some delicious dystopian fiction. Here's the gist: the world is run based on what and how much color you can see. Most people can only see one. Of course, on the surface, everything is hunky-dory but there is a disturbing secret of how they keep the society running so smoothly. A little bit darker than the Thursday Next series, but with the same amount of dry humor and obscure references.

Up next: Trying to finish The Help for book club by Monday. Fingers crossed.

Lorelei's Schedule

2010-02-11T08:48:00.003-06:00

I have determined - although I could be wrong because I don't really know what I'm talking about - that if Lorelei does not adhere to a pretty strict schedule, she becomes a horrible cranky demon child. I shouldn't complain too much since she is generally well-behaved in public - even during church! - and sleeps for most of the night no problem. But if her day does not go exactly as planned, she loses her shit and will not calm down. This has caused me to have a few minor break downs over the last few days. In order to keep her happy, this is what our day looks like:

7:30-8 am: Wake up. Change disgustingly soaked through diaper. (We use cloth diapers, so we have to use two overnight and they are both soaked in the morning). Change clothes and feed.

8-8:30 am: Play time. Either on the gym or with me or both depending on her mood. This is usually when I start doing chores since she is pretty self-sufficient while playing.

8:30-9:30 am: Change diaper (again). Either sit quietly in her swing while I shower or use the computer. Poop. Get cranky so I have to hold her.

9:30-10:15 am: Second breakfast and brief morning nap.

10:15 am - 12ish pm: Cuddle with mommy. Or lay on the boppy while I do laundry. Eat. Afternoon nap time around 12 or 12:30.

3 pm: Wake up from nap. Change and feed. This is the best time to do errands since it doesn't interfere with her usual nap time.

5 pm: Evening nap.

8-8:30 pm: Cranky pants. Time to get ready for bed. Although she usually won't go to sleep until after 9.

4-4:30 am: Time for late night feeding and then back to bed

It's not all terrible. Like I said, when she is in a good mood and we stick to the schedule, I get things done and she's not too cranky, but I sometimes worry that I am raising a baby who is going to be very spoiled and picky as she gets older. Hrm.

3 Months

2010-02-08T08:25:00.004-06:00

Dear Lorelei,

Another month has gone by too quickly. It seems like just yesterday I was sitting down to write one of these for your two month birthday. What has happened this month?

You have started to sleep through the night. Whenever I say that, its as if there is a choir of angels in my head singing the "Hallelujah" chorus. Perhaps I am tempting fate by letting the world know of your excellent sleeping habits, but I want to shout it from the rooftops! MY DAUGHTER SLEEPS FOR EIGHT HOURS! Usually. Unless your father keeps you up late to watch the end of the Superbowl. Ahem.

Speaking of which, last night you sat propped up on the couch - you can sort of sit up now but you still need a bit of help staying upright - and watched most of the game with us. At first we thought that perhaps you were a Colts fan because you smiled and made happy noises when the kicked that first field goal. And then you made distressed noises when the Saints scored in the second quarter. By the end of the game, however, I was sure you were going to start saying, "Who Dat!" Oh yeah, the Saints won!

One of my favorite things to do with you is to lay curled up in bed with you next to me. We'll be face to face and you'll reach out your little hand and grab my nose. Or my cheek fat. Or my eye. You have even managed to pull the glasses off my face. You'll just lay there smiling and cooing and generally being adorable. On the days when I'm not doing so well, that will always make me feel better.

Littlest peanut, last week we started dressing you in your three month clothes. I wanted to cry. You are growing up far too fast. It seems like just a few days ago you were so small that I could hold you in one arm and it wouldn't even be difficult. I will try to savor these moments because I know you won't be a baby forever.

Love,

Your Mother

Picture courtesy of Auntie Cecily

One Step Forward, Two Steps Back

2010-02-06T08:05:00.002-06:00

Wednesday was a good day. Well, sort of. It was good in that Brian and I have made progress in bettering our financial situation. Without going into details because its a bit embarrassing, let's just say that we have managed to accumulate a serious amount of debt and if we wanted to continue with me not working and not drown in a pile of bills, something needed to be done. So, we had a meeting with Homestead Financial (for great mortgage rates call 800-GRANNY-8!) to refinance our house. This is a great time to do it since rates are low - we are currently paying somewhere in the 7 % range which is outrageous - and our house is worth significantly more than what we bought it for. Unfortunately, there are still a lot of ifs involved with this process. We'll save money IF it appraises for the amount we estimated. But at least we're making progress towards financial security.

So. Wednesday was good. Thursday sucked the big one. It started out with being out of syrup so I had to use honey on my waffles. I actually like honey on my waffles, but I was also almost out of honey so there wasn't enough to sufficiently smother them. Then I was planning a trip out to the Target Greatland because they have a big grocery section and its mostly cheaper than Schnuck's. I had wanted to print out some coupons at Brian's office - we don't own a printer - but it required a program to be installed and the network wouldn't let us. So, crappy mood continues. Yes, I recognize that this is some pretty stupid stuff to get upset about. After a somewhat unsuccessful shopping trip I came home feeling dizzy and nauseous and instead of wanting to nap, Lorelei decided she wanted to fuss all afternoon. I was this close to finding a convenient roof to jump off of. And because of my crappy day, I wasn't feeling up to going to the ECM board meeting which just made me feel worse.

I'm hoping that today will be better. Friday was pretty good, but it always seems that after a good day I have an even more horrible one. One step forward, two steps back.

Baby Takes Own Picture!

2010-02-05T12:31:00.004-06:00

So the other day, in an attempt to keep Miss Lorelei Crankypants calm, I was sitting on the living room floor with her propped up on my knees. And since she was behaving, I thought What a great time to annoy her with the camera! So first, I took a regular picture:

And then she decided that playing with the camera would be fun - I think she was fascinated with the strap - so I let her "help" me with it. Behold her self-portrait:

Isn't she a cutie with her spit bubbles hanging out of her mouth?

This Week in Books 1/26-2/2

2010-02-03T08:44:00.003-06:00

Coraline

By Neil Gaiman

Pages: 162

This is only the second book of Neil Gaiman's that I have read (technically third but since he co-wrote Good Omens with Terry Pratchett, I don't count that one). I love him. His books are dark and somewhat twisted and humorous. Although Coraline is essentially a children's book, it still has an element of horror to it which I love. Now I really want to go out and rent the movie version to see how it was interpreted. (Side note: I saw the movie Stardust before I read the book and I liked the movie version better - the book was still wonderful - I wonder how I'll feel about this one)

JPod

By Douglas Coupland

Pages: 464

If you have ever spotted this in the library or bookstore and thought it looked interesting, drop it like a hot potato. Okay, it was funny but it was also completely ludicrous. The people in it are horrible but not in an interesting way. As far as corporate satire goes, I have read better (see: Company by Max Barry). And then there are the random pages of numbers and words in oversized lettering inserted willy-nilly throughout the book as if he was trying to pad his page count. Grumble. I will admit that I'm going to try to read Microserfs - which I've seen good reviews for - before I completely give up on him as an author.

Well, the month of January has ended. To date I have read seven books (SEVEN!) and a total of 2,527 pages. Holy. Crap.

Further Late Night Tidbits

2010-02-02T09:08:00.002-06:00

Last night, Brian and I were discussing the upcoming Trivia Night I want to attend (Julie, if you are reading this, yes I'm coming I'm just a forgetful bum and I haven't messaged you). It will be, in all likelihood my first real trip out sans baby. Because we are on a tight budget until we can get some of our finances straightened out (meeting on Wednesday with Homestead Financial - for great mortgage rates call 800-GRANNY-8!), we decided that only one of us would go and, so that Lorelei doesn't have a freak out like she does when she is awake past eight pm, the other person would stay home with her. A little bit more exposition for you: we're finally going to get a joint checking account and since I haven't worked since August, I have many checks sitting unused in a box. A lot of checks. Because I had just spent thirty bucks to buy the cute Humane Society kitty and puppy checks maybe two months before I quit working.

Everyone still with me?

So, Brian says he would write a check for me for the entrance fee but then I said I could do it because, duh, I have a million checks and I actually have money in my account right now. Then I got the crazy idea that I should write out checks for a dollar each and then when I show up on Saturday I would give them twenty checks. Genius, right?

But Brian won this round. He suggested that maybe we should do that when we, hypothetically because it's never going to happen, go to a strip club. Have a bunch of one dollar checks and tell the stripper that she can fill her own name in.

We're special.

A Sign I'm Becoming My Mother

2010-02-01T17:32:00.003-06:00

Let's get one thing straight right off the bat: I love my mother. Sure, we haven't always got along, but in general she is pretty awesome. But I have always said that when I was older and had kids of my own that I wouldn't turn into her. I think everyone says that although the transformation is probably inevitable.

When I was growing up, most of the clothes we bought were from the sale rack. My mother knew when they were about to mark down merchandise and would be there first thing in the morning to troll the racks. There is nothing wrong with this at all. But I've never been able to get into it. I think I am too overwhelmed by the disorder and complete randomness. I like it when things are arranged neatly by style and color, I don't like a jumble. Don't even get me started on those box sales. I think I start breaking out into hives whenever I even attempt those.

I have changed my ways. Especially with a baby, it seems stupid to spend full price on clothes for her when she'll only be wearing them for a few months. Today, I bought her a winter coat. On sale. For next winter. Because, guess what, it doesn't matter if it's "in style" or not. It's a coat. For a baby.

Overheard in the Lewis Household

2010-01-29T08:18:00.002-06:00

Yesterday evening after putting Lorelei to bed at a shockingly early nine pm, Brian and I snuggled down in bed for some good ol' fashioned cuddle time. You know what I mean, right? That time where you're just lying there in the dark and whispering quietly about random and stupid stuff. I love cuddle time. So, for some reason, Brian was telling me just the punch lines to jokes. Potatoes! and Only Hugh can prevent florist friars. If you have ever been subjected to Brian telling these jokes, I'm sorry. So I come back with the groan worthy, A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar and the bartender says, 'What is this a joke or something?'

As reigning champion of horrible jokes, Brian couldn't let that slide and had to come back with his own. A priest and a rabbi are sitting in a bar and the priest asks the rabbi, 'Have you have tried bacon?' And the rabbi says, 'Sure, once. Have you ever, you know, had sex?' And the priests answers, 'Once. Before I was ordained.' The rabbi says, 'Better than bacon, isn't it?' I'll let you all groan for a second...

Done? Of course this joke lead to the question, "Sex with me is better than bacon, right?"

"Well, bacon is reeeaaally good," I replied. And then I was craving bacon all night long.

The End

Celebrating the Small Victories

2010-01-28T11:49:00.002-06:00

I honestly never thought I would get this excited about making the bed. Or folding laundry. Or unloading/loading the dishwasher. But I am. Ridiculously excited. After a week of pure crap and the feeling of ice picks being hammered into my skull; today, I celebrate the small victories. The chores that actually get done, the baby who goes down easily for a nap, the legs that get shaved. (There's a nice mental picture for you all, over a week's worth of hair growth on my legs. Sexy.)

Tomorrow, when everything goes down hill again, I'll be back to whining. But for today, I'm feeling good.

This Week in Books 1/20-1/26

2010-01-28T08:50:00.002-06:00

Whoops. Forgot to do this yesterday because - well, let's face it - yesterday sucked giant donkey balls.

Leviathan

By Scott Westerfeld

Pages: 440

In all honesty, I can't decide if I love this book or just have generally positive feelings about it. In a nutshell, its a steam punk alternative history of World War I. Yes, you read that right. It's an interesting concept and he's come up with some pretty cool inventions/ideas, but I'm just not sold on it yet. Plus, I really hate it when books end in such a way that it is obvious there is a sequel coming. Like really obvious. It almost felt like the book wasn't completely finished. Oh well, will probably have to wait awhile for the sequel. One more book to read by him and then I'll be all Westerfelded out.

Dead Until Dark

By Charlaine Harris

Pages: 292

Ugh. I can't believe I actually willingly read this. Okay, it wasn't that bad. The writing was pretty juvenile. I thought we had gotten past the need to describe in detail what everyone is wearing. Vomit. And the sex scenes sucked. And not in a sucked vampire blood way. In an oh-my-god-I-can't-believe-someone-writes-sex-like-this-way. Also, was it really necessary. I'm all for romance novels with lots of sex in them, because that's what they're all about, but this is pretending to be a mystery novel, it just doesn't work for me. Also, doesn't do it for me.

At the Edge

2010-01-26T15:35:00.002-06:00

Of my sanity.

I am a strong self-sufficient woman, right? Well, perhaps not. I won't lie, in the past eight and a half years (holy crap!), I've become pretty dependent on Brian. Not in a THE-WORLD-WILL-END-IF-HE'S-NOT-THERE kind of way, but I have gotten used to him being around to pick up the slack. And, let's be honest, keep me from descending into a pit of depression and self-pity. He's good at that sort of thing.

Unfortunately, he's been gone since early Thursday morning. (Yeah, yeah. I know its only been five days, but this is the longest he's been gone since Lorelei was born.) Thursday itself was not so bad. Fortunately for my flu-like self, baby was generally well-behaved and as inclined to sleep as I was. Friday sucked the big one. But I've already mentioned that and last night and this morning have pretty much killed me. I don't know. Lorelei and I - or so I thought - had reached something of an understanding. Up by nine, nap around noon, bed by eight-thirty. Oh no. That was just not going to happen.

So I yelled at my two-month old. I feel like a horrible horrible mother. I know I shouldn't have done it, but she was just frustrating me so much. On top of which, the cats have been driving me crazy and I just really need a break. Five minutes to myself. Thank goodness Brian is home in about six hours because I don't think I can make it much longer.

Blink Blink Blink

2010-01-25T08:32:00.002-06:00

A blinking cursor. Mocking me. You don't have anything interesting to say, it's telling me. Who really wants to hear the mundane details of your boring little life?

Blink blink blink.

Sometimes, I listen to that annoying little cursor and I close my new post window without writing a single thing. Sometimes, I don't.

I remind myself that this blog is as much for me as it is for anyone else. I want to be able to look back, many years from now, and remember what it was like. Remember when my daughter was just a tiny baby. Remember the mundane and stupid details of my life. Maybe I'll never do anything truly spectacular. Maybe I'll never publish a book. Maybe I'll only be remembered as a mother. I'm trying to accept that. I still want to remember

---

In that spirit. A brief recap of this past weekend in bullet form

Lorelei completely freaked out on me Friday night. Everything I did made here scream. I would try to feed her, she would scream. I would change her, she would scream. I would try to put her in her crib, she would scream. I would hold her, she would scream. I was so close to losing it since I was at home by myself, but by some miracle and after many tears - hers and mine - she still was in bed by ten. Phew.
Saturday I managed to leave the house and run a few errands before noon. A miracle considering the night before. I also managed to do a bit of cleaning because...
Julie came over to knit. Whee! We watched Zoolander and Elf and Lorelei spent most of that time napping so I managed to get mostly done with one of my belated Christmas scarves.
Yesterday was pretty chill. Took a three hour nap - probably accounts for all the trouble I had getting baby to go to sleep last night - and then hung out with Desiree for a few hours.
It's worth noting that I have some pretty awesome friends. They knew I was going to be pretty lonely and stressed with Brian being gone and me being sick (I'm much better now, thank you) and I had lots of offers for help and company.
Thirty-six hours till husband returns. I really miss him.

An Open Letter to the People of St Louis

2010-01-22T16:43:00.003-06:00

Dear St Louis,

I ~~loathe despise hate~~ have generally negative feelings about you. Well. Not you. I like you as a city. You have such wonderful institutions like Companion and the Cupcakery and Mississippi Mud. My library is in an awesome old building and not old in that built in the 70's way. And then there's those Cardinals. I can even look past your pathetic excuse for a public transportation system. But there's just something about you.

1) You have a complete disregard for traffic laws

Now, I have never claimed to be the best driver on the planet and I do speed and, occasionally, I will run a yellow light. But you seem to believe that 70 is not fast enough when the speed limit is 55. Or that 55 is not fast enough when there is still ice on the roads. You tailgate instead of passing until you can't take it anymore and then you'll whip around and cut people off. Or you'll cut people off because you didn't see the three signs for your off-ramp and have to triple lane change to make it. You run red lights. Like really run them. Not just it was yellow and then it turned red while you were in the intersection but it was red and the two cars in front of you also ran the light.

2) You think the street is a parking lot.

As in, instead of pulling over to the side of the road to drop someone off or wait to pick someone up, you just stop in the middle of the street. Frequently even if there is a space not ten feet away. And then when you see another car pulling up behind you, instead of moving you continue to have an argument with your baby mama in the middle of the street. You pull up at a stop sign and someone will run up to your car (probably to make a drug deal) and you completely disregard the fact that there is someone behind you at the stop sign. Now, I recognize it may seem like we're in the suburbs because its mostly residences, but we're not. This is still the city and the streets are too narrow for you to do that.

3) You honk your car horns too much.

Instead of getting out of the car and going up to someone's house, you honk your horn. Repeatedly. Over a several minute period. Did you ever thank that perhaps they weren't home or didn't know it was them you were honking for? Perhaps you should just knock on their door.

4) You have arguments in the middle of the street.

Sometimes late at night. Like 3 in the morning late. Much like your car honking, is it really necessary to do this outside on your front porch or in the street? Wouldn't it be better to go inside and fight with your baby mama.

5) You think it's okay to blast your car stereo late into the night while your friends hang out in their front yard smoking weed.

I've told you this before. But not everyone likes rap music and not everyone wants it blasted at them from a car that is parked less than twenty feet from their house. And we especially don't like it when you do it until midnight or later. And I can smell your weed. Seriously. Go inside and do that.

6) You invented Imo's.

Seriously. That is the most disgusting pizza on the face of the planet. It is a sin against nature. Why would you do such a thing?

So I hope you'll understand St Louis that I can only ever consider myself a temporary resident. I don't think it's wise for us to pursue a long term relationship since you and I both know I will always be on the look out for something better. I hope this doesn't ruin our friendship.

Love,

Bitch Bitch Moan Moan

2010-01-21T16:39:00.002-06:00

Can I whine for a minute? Of course I can. This is my blog and if you don't want to read my whining, you don't have to.

I hate my body. Not that way I look - although there is room for improvement - but the way my body works. I can't ever seem to catch a break. Every Christmas I get sick. Like really really don't-wake-me-up-for-five-days-and-maybe-I'll-be-better sick. It's usually the flu or something flu-like - or in 2008, an intestinal parasite - but this year I got lucky and just had a very minor cold. Which, unfortunately, I gave to Lorelei. I thought, maybe getting that seasonal flu vaccine was a good idea and maybe I should do it again even though I don't plan on being pregnant again for a few years. But, no! My body, she hates me. I've had a migraine-y type headache for the last couple of weeks; but I didn't think anything of it because headaches are a common side effect of the medication I'm on and I figured my higher dosage was screwing with my system. Yesterday, I took my nap as per usual and Lorelei actually cooperated and slept for almost two blissful hours but when I woke up, I felt like I had been hit by a bus. I shrugged it off because my friend was coming over and we were going out for milkshakes (how very 1950's of us) and I thought well maybe it's just a sleep hangover. Does anyone else get those? Where you actually get a really good nap in but when you wake up you almost feel worse than before you went to sleep.

Where was I?

Oh yes. Felt like I was hit by a bus. Sore all over. My neck hurt. Etc etc. And then the chills came. Oh fun. My favorite part of being sick is the feeling of not being able to get warm enough and then sweating profusely. Fun. I kid you not I was under a down comforter a quilt and an extremely warm throw blanket and I was still freezing. And the shaking. Oh my god. I felt like...well, I felt like I did after giving birth, like a weak thing that could barely move.

On top of all this, Brian left this morning for a five day trip to Cleveland and Pittsburgh. So, feel like dying and husband gone and oh yeah two month old. Two month old who was a serious drama queen and didn't fall asleep until 11 last night. Kill me now.

Oh. And said two month old spent most of this afternoon freaking out about something although I don't know what and wouldn't take an effing nap. Is it Tuesday yet?

This Week in Books 1/13-1/19

2010-01-20T10:58:00.003-06:00

I'm going to try this new thing where I document what I've read each week along with a few comments so that I have some record of what and how much I've read and for any of my readers if they are curious.

Extras

Scott Westerfeld

Pages: 417

This is technically the fourth book in a series (and yes I have read the other 3) but it reads well on its own. In fact, I would almost recommend reading this one by itself instead of with the other Uglies books. Although some of the characters from the first three do reappear in this one, they are not the central characters and I find the story doesn't mesh as well with the other books. That being said, it was still a great read. Very fast paced and an interesting commentary on today's society. Without giving too much away, the society depicted in the book is based on fame in which where you live and what you can buy is based on how popular you are. Can you say Twitter anyone?

Liar

Justine Larbalestier

Pages: 384

So funny thing. The authors of the two books I read this week are married. Heh. Anywho. The narrator of this book is a liar. She admits it in the first sentence. If you can't stand unreliable narrators, this is not a book for you. But if you like a bit of a mystery and you like to be left wondering what exactly is happening, I highly recommend it. I'm still going "what the fuck" and I finished it several days ago.

Can I Gloat?

2010-01-20T10:30:00.001-06:00

I have a freakin' adorable daughter. She's so curious and active and she loves her zebra. Stop growing up so fast!

I've Got That Itch...

2010-01-19T13:35:00.003-06:00

No. Not that kind. The itch to move again. I love my house. I really do. Unfortunately, I think it has almost reached the point where - without some major remodeling - it's just not going to work for our little family anymore. It has one bedroom. One! In the middle of the house with no doors. Which is why our bedroom is actually in the basement. A few years ago, when we were looking to buy our first house, we looked at a converted duplex that, at the time, was out of our price range. Guess what? It's on the market again for a mere $24,000. I wonder what kind of horrible damage has been done to the interior in the last four years (there are no pictures of the inside on the website). But if it's not too bad, perhaps it would be worth it to move. Then we would have a bedroom with a door and a bedroom for Lorelei. Want to see it, then click here.

I've definitely got that itch.

There Are Moments

2010-01-15T19:24:00.002-06:00

There are moments when I am paralyzed with fear. Oh my God, what have I gotten myself into? There are moments when I wish with all my might that I could rewind the last year because I am so not ready to be a mother. What the hell am I doing? I'm not working - a fact that I am sure many other mothers out there would damn me for - but I still find it hard to juggle everything. How do I take care of an infant and keep house and keep doing the things I love to do? I can count on one hand the number of hours I've had to myself since she was born. The longest stretch was when I went for a massage - with travel time a grand total of 2 hours - and I honestly felt guilty about it.

There are moments where I don't feel like myself anymore. As if the only thing I am is a mother. I don't want to deny that part of myself, and I recognize that being a mother is going to be huge part of my life. But that's not all I am. I am a woman who loves to read, who loves to write, who loves to take photographs. A woman who loves to play stupid video games with her husband, who loves to watch stupid movies. Someone who loves to sit quietly with a cup of coffee (or tea) in a quiet coffee shop somewhere with a book or a laptop. Those things that I love don't seem to fit in anymore.

I knew that it would be like this. I knew that I would have a much harder time adjusting than a lot of other women but this last week has been one of the roughest yet. I hide it pretty well I think. From everyone except for Brian. But sometimes I think he doesn't know how hard it is for me. I cry.

Then there are these moments which make it all worth it. Which remind me how much I love baby Lorelei and how I couldn't imagine my life being any different. It's just going to take me some time.

How We Can Help

2010-01-14T09:28:00.003-06:00

I don't watch the news. I admit it. The reason I generally don't watch the news is because when ever I do there is always a story about something terrible happening in the world. I know. Ignoring it, won't make it go away. Hearing about what is happening in Haiti makes me sick to my stomach. Here is a country that was already struggling. According to Wikipedia (and yes I looked it up), it is the poorest country in the Americas and eighty percent of the population was living in poverty. Most Haitians live on $2 a day or less. This earthquake has completely devastated the country with the Red Cross estimating at least 3 million people were affected by it.

So. Here's what we can do. One of my favorite bloggers to ~~stalk~~ read is encouraging everyone to leave a comment on her post for the day and she will donate $1 for every comment. She even wants her readers with blogs to send people over. So that's what I'm doing. Go and comment on her post here. She has links to other people who are doing the same. And although my readership is small and I'm sure the husband will kill me for doing this without asking first, if I can get at least ten comments, we will donate $10. That is unfortunately the most I can do right now.

For more ways to help, see this article on CNN. Or you can write your own post. Link to me. Link to her. Let's see what we can do!

EDIT: Didn't reach ten comments by midnight. Sad panda. But since I'm not heartless, I've already donated my ten dollars to the Red Cross.

Cross One Off the List

2010-01-12T19:39:00.002-06:00

I have procured a library card! Actually, I have been meaning to get one for the last week, but it never seemed like a good time what with the snow and single digit temperatures. But tonight was the night! The husband and I took the baby with us to the library on south Grand. If you haven't been, it is a very nice library and considerably better looking and cleaner than the one back home in Vancouver, but the fiction section smells vaguely of feces. That's right feces. It's not a particularly strong smell, but it's there and it sort of detracts from the overall niceness of the building. I might have said something mean and slightly inappropriate about why it smelled to Brian, but I won't repeat it here. You all can just imagine what it is I could have said.

So. Where was I? Oh, yes. I have a library card now and I checked out three books. Yes, three and I have two more that I requested because they were checked out from that location. That is five books which I will attempt to finish reading before the first week of February. If you are curious I got Extras and Leviathan by Scott Westerfeld, Coraline by Neil Gaiman, JPod by Douglas Coupland and Liar by Justine Larbalestier. And yes I know four of the five are considered "Young Adult," but I just can't help myself.

On a related note: I have finished reading my first book since September! It was Up Till Now: The Autobiography by William Shatner. Truly high class reading. It was actually not that bad and there were both some truly funny and truly touching moments. I admit, I started tearing up when he was talking about the tragic death of his third wife. And the story about the skunk, tomato juice and an EMT is worth the price of the book. Hilarious! I am using too many exclamation marks!

Nine Weeks

2010-01-10T11:11:00.003-06:00

Dear Lorelei,

Just a few hours ago, you officially became nine weeks old. Congratulations! I cannot believe it has already been two months since you were born, it feels like just yesterday I was lying in labor and delivery with my feet up in the air...wait, too gross. Moving on.

Little girl. Little peanut. Little bit. You awe me. Every single day. You are so curious about the world around you, always looking about. Right now you are attempting to knock over the toy bar on your Merry Monkey Gym. So cute. It feels weird to take you out places and it feels like people are always giving me weird looks, but you like it. Remember in the Climatron you made that weird cross-eyed face when we first got there. It was as if you were saying, "What is this shit?" Although, perhaps with slightly less vulgar language.

So. What has happened in the last two months. You met the majority of your relatives. Grandma and Grandpa Lewis were here just after you were born. They cooked and cleaned and helped mommy and daddy through those first few rough days when you were hungry all the time and refused to be put down. Then Mam-Ma and Pap-Pa were here for two and a half weeks. They cooked and cleaned too. And Pap-Pa held you a lot. He loved snuggling with his grandbaby. Then before Christmas we went to Toledo and you met your great aunts and great-grandma. You were such a good baby on the drive there, but the hotel really freaked you out. That first night you didn't want to sleep because you were too busy crying.

You went to two - count 'em: two - Christmas parties. You were so well behaved and even let others hold you and play with you. Then you had your first Christmas. Although you slept through all of the gift opening, including the traditional one gift on Christmas Eve, at least you got snow on your first Christmas. And although mommy and daddy were both kind of sick we still had a good time. We even went to the Botanical Gardens the next day and daddy got to share his love of model trains with you.

What else? You've started to smile. All the time. It makes me so happy when you smile at me. This cute little grin. And you make the cutest little happy noises.

Time seems to be flying by. Fast forwarding. I can't wait for you to start crawling and walking and talking and all that, but I'm really going to miss these first few months when you were so tiny and everything was new.

I love you so much,

Your Mother

Snow Day

2010-01-07T21:09:00.002-06:00

I miss snow days. I miss the anticipation - watching the news channel to see if maybe, just maybe, my school would be among the ones closed. Then, after a blissful extra couple hours of sleep, my mother would awaken me. We would have bacon and eggs and biscuits. You know, the things we would only eat on the weekend because there was just no time in the morning. I would pull on my snow pants - you know, the oh-so-attractive overalls - and about five layers of shirts and long underwear and huge ski gloves. I would meet my friends Lily and Rachel (we all lived within walking distance of one another) and we would make snowmen or get into a snowball fight with our brothers. Building a fort. Maybe, if it was a really good snow, we would take trash bags and go sledding down the hill by Lily's house. This was before they added the new development. Usually, one of us would end up in a ditch but we still did it. And then, after we had worn ourselves out and every piece of clothing was soaked through we would curl up on the couch at one of our houses (usually Lily's because they were wealthy and had a bigger house) and one of our mom's would make us hot chocolate with extra marshmallows and we would watch Disney movies. I miss snow days.

Today, we had an unofficial snow day in our house since Brian's boss told them not to come in if the weather was bad. We snuggled at home. Had pancakes and drank coffee. Didn't get dressed until almost noon. Baby and I snuggled in bed all afternoon and Brian worked on his laptop. It was glorious. But I can't wait until I get to purchase snow pants for my own daughter and her and her friends get to build snowmen and get into snowball fights and ride trash bags down a hill. And I'll be the mom who waits at home with hot chocolate and extra marshmallows, cookies and Disney movies.

If I Had a Million Dollars...

2010-01-06T09:45:00.002-06:00

What would you do with a million dollars? Me? I know exactly what I would do. First I would pay off both mine and Brian's student loans. Then it would be credit cards and then the car. And after all that, if there was a decent amount left, I would buy us a new house. Then I would be set. Sure, there are things I want but I just can't imagine spending large amounts of money on them. I don't get the whole designer clothes and shoes and purses thing. I have two Coach bags which I bought at the outlet store at the lake and neither of them are obviously Coach. I like it that way. I don't like it when people judge me based on what I spend my money on. Sure, I like nice things and I like to look nice and put together when I leave the house, but I can do that just as easily spending a hundred dollars as I can spending a thousand. So, what would I do with the leftover money? I would give it away.

Ever since graduating from Wash U, I've known that eventually I want to be able to afford to have a scholarship in my name because I know I would never have been able to attend such a good school without one.

I would want to help my friends. I know it sounds weird and I know that most of my friends would probably turn down any help, but if I could...if I had that million...that's what I'd want to do. Too many of my friends live paycheck to paycheck. Too many of them feel guilty when they buy something nice for themselves because they've worked hard and they deserve it because they feel like they should save that money for bills. It's just not fair.

But I don't have a million dollars. So, all of this will just have to wait.

Dear St Louis Weather

2010-01-05T20:05:00.002-06:00

You and I used to have an okay relationship. Sure, I whined when it was 100 degrees outside and I had to walk half a mile from my parking spot to work in air that was basically soup. Or when I had to walk to finals in several inches of snow and below freezing wind chill. But, I thought we had an understanding. This summer, you were so pleasant for the majority of the time. I got to laugh at all the people I knew back home who were sweltering in their 100-plus heat for a week with no air-conditioning because it's never that hot in Washington. When Lorelei was born in November, instead of being cold and snowy, you were mild and sunny. And then you graced daughter's first Christmas with snow. That was nice. What happened? Why did you decide to all of a sudden bitch slap me with highs in the low teens? What have I ever done to deserve this? I think my toes are permanently frozen from my trip to the dentist yesterday. If you are going to be this cold, could you at least snow some so there is something pretty to look at and play in. I mean, I don't have anywhere to be, so being stuck inside is cool with me.

Well, consider this relationship over. St Louis weather: I hate you.

Love,

A Perfect Moment

2010-01-04T17:38:00.003-06:00

Lorelei has started to smile now. Like real smiles. This afternoon, because I was tired and she was a bit fussy, we cuddled in bed together. She would smile and reach out to me. It was a perfect moment. And then she pooped.

Year in Review

2009-12-31T10:40:00.004-06:00

I used to do this survey every year for awhile but I think it's been a year or two. This morning while catching up on one of the many bloggers I ~~stalk~~ read, I noticed that she did the same survey and I thought: my brain can't come up with anything too original right now so why not?

1. What did you do in 2009 that you had never done before?

The obvious would be getting pregnant and giving birth to a beautiful daughter and everything that goes along with it. Also changing a poopy diaper. That's right, I had never changed a diaper before. I also totaled my car. As a fairly careful, if occasionally impatient but not doucheally (douchebagily?) impatient, I have only inflicted minor damage to my car before and usually while doing something really stupid (ie Backing down an alley in the pouring rain and running into a dumpster. Ahem.)

2. Did you keep your new year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

I honestly don't think I made a specific resolution. Past experience with failing at every one I've made has kept me from doing them in recent years. This year, I am hesitant to make any because I worry that, you know, taking care of a new life and all will keep me from really committing to any one thing. I do, however, want to do better so I will make some:

Read more. It has been several months at least since I last finished a book. I have two that I have started but have only gotten through the first few pages/chapters of (Up Till Now: The Autobiography by William Shatner and People of the Book by Geraldine Brooks, in case you're interested). And since I have a to be read stack that is out of control and a want to read list that is insanely long, I think I really need to work on this.
On a related note: get a library card.
Cook at home more.
Related: eat more healthfully.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

You mean besides me? My childhood friend Rachel gave birth to her son Liam this past summer. And then a few people I knew from college but wasn't particularly close to.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

I had to think about this one for a minute but no. As far as I know, not anyone even remotely related to me which is amazing. If I have left someone out because I'm absent minded, let me know.

5. What countries did you visit?

Other than the one I live in? None, sadly. Before little bit came into the picture Brian and I had been talking about going to Ireland this fall. Obviously, that became completely out of the question. I get the feeling that we won't be doing any traveling outside the country for the next few years at least.

6. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?

This is going to sound depressing. I would like to have a better outlook on life. I'm going to share a story, and maybe it will embarrass the husband, but I think it's really sweet. We have an ornament on our tree that is this little circular mailbox that says "Letters to Santa." When I took it out this year, I noticed that there was paper in it and I had completely forgotten that Brian had written something and put in there. At first he didn't want me to read it, but I don't like secrets and I ~~browbeat~~ ~~wheedled~~ asked really him really nicely until he gave in. It said: I want Kirsten to be happier. Commence the groaning now. So, there you go.

7. What dates from 2009 will remain etched on your memory, and why?

I always hate this question because usually no specific date comes to mind. However, I do have two. March 12th, the day my pregnancy test was positive and November 8th, the day my daughter was born.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

I feel like this question is asking me to list some huge award or promotion or something like that, but I'm afraid that I don't work and even if I did where I have worked has never awarded me with anything. Seriously. I was voted employee of the month at my CPK the month they decided that they weren't going to do plaques or give bonuses for that anymore; so, that doesn't count. And despite the fact that I have been told I deserved it, I never won the Mother Bread award at Bread Co. Instead, someone who it turned out was stealing was the one who won it. But I digress. Achievement wise I think figuring out what it is I want to do with my life, whether I succeed in it or not, has been my biggest accomplishment.

9. What was your biggest failure?

I think I feel like a failure the most when I haven't been the best wife, or best mother, that I possibly could be.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

When I went to the emergency room, they asked me if I had any illnesses and my response was, "Does being pregnant count?" Reason for trip to the emergency room: I fell down my front stairs and severely sprained the ligaments on the top of my foot.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

Ummm. Most of the things I buy are trivial and although I did spend a lot on my new car, I can't really say that it was the best thing I bought. I'm going to have to say it was the SUPER SECRET SURPRISE PRESENT that I got for my friend just for fun. I like making people smile especially for a totally unexpected reason.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

My husband. Everyday (almost, he's not perfect after all) he amazes me with how supportive and loving he is. I don't think I tell him often enough how much I appreciate what he does for me.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

There are a few; but, in the spirit of a new year, I will not detail that behavior here.

14. Where did most of your money go?

Bills, bills and more bills.

15. What did you get really excited about?

I feel like a broken record: the birth of my daughter.

16. What song will always remind you of 2009?

Uhh...well, I can tell you what song my iTunes played the most. "Dark Blue" by Jack's Mannequin. I'm pretty musically challenged these days.

17. Compared to this time last year are you:

happier or sadder? About the same
thinner or fatter? Oddly, about the same since I lost about ten pounds before I got pregnant
richer or poorer? Financially, definitely poorer. In everything else, I'd have to say richer.

18. What do you wished you'd done more of?

Read, knit, cook, bake. Spend more time friends and less time as a hermit.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?

Cry for no good reason.

20. How did you spend Christmas?

Pre-Christmas weekend, we traveled to scenic Toledo, Ohio for my mother-in-law's sixtieth birthday. There was much sleeping and eating and going to the art museum and dealing with a fussy schedule interrupted baby. Then I got sick. Then we opened many presents on Christmas morning while the baby slept through the entire thing. Then I got even sicker and we had lunchmeat sandwiches for dinner. But on Boxing Day we went to the Botanical Gardens and it was all better.

21. Did you fall in love in 2009?

With a perfect baby daughter.

22. What was your favorite TV program?

I'm so over television right now. I watch reruns of NCIS and Bones and that makes me perfectly happy. Although I do enjoy Castle.

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?

I'm trying not to hate anyone, but I'd have to say I just hate the same people.

24. What was the best book you read?

I haven't done a whole lot of reading as I've said before, but I really enjoyed The Hunger Games and Catching Fire by Suzanne Collins. Side note: Amazon finally has a release date for the third book. August 2010! Whoo!

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?

I have terrible taste in music.

26. What did you want and get?

A new car, although not in the way it happened. A new job, which unfortunately turned out to suck almost as much as the old job.

27. What did you want and not get?

I want for nothing.

28. What was your favorite film of this year?

Do you know, the last movie I saw in the theatres was Harry Potter? God I'm lame. I would have to say the new Star Trek was my favorite though.

29. What did you do on your birthday and how old were you?

I turned 27 this year and on my birthday I worked in the morning and then Brian took me to the Melting Pot. And then I envied all the people who could drink.

30. What is the one thing that would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

Again, I want for nothing. I think I've had an amazingly good year despite some of the low moments.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?

Whatever fit over my ever-expanding ass. Sweat pants and big t-shirts.

32. What kept you sane?

An amazing husband and amazing friends.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Barack Obama. But mostly because I just love listening to him speak.

34. What political issue stirred you the most?

Definitely health care and all the stupid stupid people out there that don't realize that universal health care is not some communist plot to take down the American way of life.

35. Who did you miss?

Blake. I wish she didn't live in New Orleans.

36. Who was the best new person you met?

Meredith. And her crazy husband Frank who I swear is just like Brian.

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009?

Money can't buy you love. No wait, that's a song. Nothing comes to mind right now, I'll get back to you.

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year?

"I want my life to make more sense..." from Pavement Tune by The Frames.

Well, that's all folks. I'll see you next year.

Things and Stuff

2009-12-30T09:11:00.003-06:00

Today I have accomplished the following things:

Finished the Washington Post crossword (with minimal hints) at 3:30 am.
Had biscuits and coffee.
Took a shower.
Also, straightened my hair, brushed my teeth, washed my face and put on makeup. How the hell did this happen?

Today I need to do the following:

Fold laundry. Also put away the dirty laundry that has accumulated in random places around the house.
Knit. Still have two half finished Christmas presents which need to get done.
Clean the kitchen.
Bake cookies with Desiree!
Relax.

Now that I've bored you all with my to do list...

It has been awhile since I last posted and even longer since I posted something that didn't have anything to do with football. Life goes on. Baby eats and sleeps and poops. She has also developed a slight cold thanks to my inability to go one Christmas season without getting sick. Go me! It is possibly one of the most pathetic and adorable things ever. She snores in such a ridiculously cute way! Fortunately, it's nothing serious - trust me, I obsessively check her temperature and she has yet to get a fever - and although she sleeps a little more than usual, she's still eating plenty and doesn't seem too uncomfortable.

Now that I've bored you with baby gushing...

I am in love with the Botanical Gardens. Yes. Even in the dead of winter. I could spend hours taking pictures of every plant in the Linnean House. Easily my favorite part of the gardens (except for the rose garden, but everything is dead right now). It is generally very quiet - not a lot of people go in there - and it smells delicious. Every time we go, I think its all the tea trees that smell that way but as it turns out, it's actually the olive trees. Weird that I like the smell of olive trees when olives themselves make me want to gag. If it hadn't snowed last night - not that I'm complaining, I love the snow - I would totally be there this morning enjoying my free admission before noon. Anyhoodle, a couple of pictures to round out this mish mash of randomness:

Dying roses and snow covered garden

Whee! I like model trains Daddy!

NFL Picks, Week One Billion

2009-12-13T12:18:00.004-06:00

Oops. Overslept (originally typed oversplet) this morning. Guess what though? We have the NFL network now. Aren't we cool? Instead of actually watching the game we can just watch the stats from the games. Awesome.

Thursday game: PIT vs CLE: I laugh at the actual outcome of this game but since I would never have picked the Browns, I have to claim I said Steelers

NO vs ATL: So Brian tells me that Atlanta is missing its quarterback and starting running back, but I would never have bet against the Saints anyway. Saints

GB vs CHI: I guess I'll go with Green Bay, or something. Packers

DEN vs IND: I like Denver's logo better, but I'm not sure they can win against the Colts. So there you go. Colts

BUF vs KC: This is just a game of crap. But I'm going with the Bills

DET vs BAL: Oh, God. Ravens

SEA vs HOU: Well, I guess I gotta pick the Lone Star State team, on account of me hating teal and all. Texans

MIA vs JAX: I have no smart-ass remarks for this one. Ugh. Dolphins

CIN vs MIN: Hmm. Hmm. Hmm. Just to be contrary, I'm gonna pick the Bengals.

CAR vs NE: Elvis beats up on big cats. Probably also little cats. Maybe dogs? He was a lousy person (I'm only saying this because I now know that Sean reads this). Patriots.

NYJ vs TB: Even though their logo sucks donkey balls, I'm saying J-E-T-S JETS JETS JETS

STL vs TEN: The Titans lost an important game last week, and are going to come out of the locker room very pissed off. Maybe they can use their flaming thumbtack logo to take down the lambs...I mean, Rams. Titans.

WAS vs OAK: Black and silver is better than maroon and gold. That's just terrible. Raiders.

SD vs DAL: The Chargers' logo is a stupid freaking lightning bolt. Not that Dallas's is any better - just some boring star. I guess I'll go with the Chargers.

PHI vs NYG: The Giants have lost something like six of the last seven games. Even though the Eagles win a color that is close to teal (Brian tells me it's "Pine," they're probably going to win against a team with a classic, throwback logo. Eagles.

ARI vs SF: Gold and red, as previously mentioned, is ugly. And let's face it, Kurt Warner is still sexy. Cardinals.

NFL Picks, Week Thirteen

2009-12-06T19:07:00.003-06:00

In the interest of full disclosure: yes, I am doing my picks at 7 pm on a Sunday, however, I haven't turned on the television all day and so I only know the outcome of two of the games due mostly to facebook statuses. See if you can guess which two.

NYJ vs BUF: Okay, I also know who won this game because it was on Thursday but since I find the Bills color scheme to be an eyesore despite New York's lame logo, I would have picked the Jets

STL vs CHI: In terms of logos, St Louis wins hands down. But they suck. A lot. But Chicago is not all the great either. Conundrum. Bears

TB vs CAR: They both suck. As teams. Panthers

HOU vs JAX: I hate teal. Texans

DEN vs KC: Flaming horse head! Broncos

TEN vs IND: The Titans are not so good. Not bad. But not so good. The Colts are very good, apparently unhindered by their boring logo-ness. Colts

PHI vs ATL: Michael Vick returns to Atlanta. Big fricking deal. Falcons

NO vs WAS: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Saints

OAK vs PIT: Ben Roethlisberger is a hoosier. But at least he doesn't play for the Raiders. Steelers

DET vs CIN: I have asked Brian at least twice this week if Carson Palmer played for the Bengals. I think my brain has gone fuzzy from the baby. Both times I asked this because I couldn't remember if he was related to Jesse Palmer, who - if I remember correctly - was on the Bachelor before he crapped out of the NFL. Bengals

NE vs MIA: Dolphins. Teal. Ack. Patriots

SD vs CLE: Did you know that the Browns logo is an orange helmet. Shouldn't it be a Brown helmet? Chargers

DAL vs NYG: Texas pride! Cowboys

SF vs SEA: Pain. My eyes hurt from the horrible color. 49ers

MIN vs ARI: Two cranky old men duke it out. Vikings

BAL vs GB: I like purple. Packers (Fooled you!)

Patience

2009-12-04T13:02:00.003-06:00

I have never had much patience. I bet you're wondering how I managed to survive almost five years in food service without it. Fortunately, I'm very good at pretending to have patience. I have spent years cultivating my ability to look like I'm not impatient while in my head I am secretly yelling, "Oh my GOD! Will you just make up your mind already!" Anyone who has ridden in the car with me can also attest to this since while driving I tend to be very verbal about what I think of the other drivers on the road. I was once trapped behind an old man going twenty miles per hour (I shit you not) on the interstate and I wanted to beat my head into the steering wheel.

I spent my entire pregnancy being impatient. I blame the back pain. Perhaps my impatience wore off on the little one since she decided to appear ten days early. Since then, however, I have had to force myself to be calm. You can't rush a newborn. She will eat for as long as she wants to and there is nothing I can to do to speed up the process. This can be especially frustrating when she awakens in the middle of the night and I would like nothing more than to go back to sleep. The second night in the hospital was the worst. Since I was breastfeeding, this can be a very long process - especially in the early days. We're talking five plus hours. From about nine pm to three am she was feeding off and on and every time I thought she was finished and went to put her back in her bassinet, she started screaming bloody murder. To make matters worse, I must have had the worse nurse on the face of the planet who didn't seem to give a crap that I was breastfeeding and I did not want to give my daughter formula or a pacifier. So, she was crying and I was crying and by the time she finally went to sleep, I looked like I had been punched in the face. My eyes were practically swollen shut.

Good news, though, after all of that everything seems so much easier. Sure there are times when I want to scream. She's crying and crying and I've done everything I can think of to make her feel better. Is she dry? Is she fed? Is she burped? What the hell else do I need to do? But then there are times when I have reached a completely zen like state and no matter what, I will do everything in my power to make my daughter happy.

The first of many lessons that she will teach me: Patience.

NFL Picks, Week Twelve

2009-11-26T10:31:00.002-06:00

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

GB vs DET: I still don't understand why Detroit always has a Thanksgiving Day game, they never win. Packers

OAK vs DAL: I think Oakland might have won last week. Who cares? Cowboys

NYG vs DEN: Three games today? WTF? Broncos

TB vs ATL: Red versus red. Atlanta has better red. Falcons

MIA vs BUF: My hatred of all things teal is well documented and my feelings about dolphins playing on land, but the Bills have kind of let me down recently. Dolphins

WAS vs PHI: Eagles

SEA vs STL: I can't in good conscience pick the Seahawks, even if the Rams do suck big donkey balls. Rams

CAR vs NYJ: Jets

CLE vs CIN: HAHAHA! Bengals

IND vs HOU: Can the Colts keep their undefeated streak alive? My feelings say yes, despite the boring logo. Colts

KC vs SD: Chargers

JAC vs SF: Both of these teams colors hurt my eyes. 49ers

CHI vs MIN: Vikings

ARI vs TEN: Is Kurt Warner hurt? I could look it up because I have no faith in Matt Leinart's abilities. Oh well. Cardinals

PIT vs BAL: I like purple. Ravens

NE vs NO: If I only I knew if Bill Belichick was going to be wearing his awesome headband, that would make this decision so much easier. I still love me some sexy Drew Brees action. Saints

My Labor Story

2009-11-22T21:15:00.001-06:00

...or the things you never learn from the movies.

I have been attempting to write a coherent and not boring post about the birth of my daughter since Thursday. Trouble is, I don't think anyone out there really wants to hear all the gory details of my labor and delivery. So, here are the highlights.

Apparently, food poisoning can send you into labor. I ate a bad can of soup Thursday night, threw up and then started having frequent if somewhat irregular contractions.
Pregnancy assessment is the devil. I was there Friday night with contractions about 4 minutes apart but got sent home because there hadn't been any change in my cervix since I had gotten there. And then on Saturday, when we went back and my contractions had gotten worse, they tried to send me home twice but I refused because I think I knew it was going to be that night.
Also, how depressing is pregnancy assessment? It's a tiny room with a very uncomfortable bed that has extremely sketchy floral wallpaper.
When they break your water, did you know that it feels like you peed yourself? And then during subsequent contractions it continues to feel like your peeing yourself?
No matter how badly I didn't want to get an epidural (another random fact, they have to give you a catheter when you get an epidural because not only can you not feel your legs but you also have no concept of whether or not you need to pee), when I was screaming in pain because oh my god this whole breathing through a contraction shit is not working, I will break down.
Fifteen minutes after they finished giving me the epidural - which they had to do twice because the anesthesiologist didn't place it quite right the first time - I was fully dilated and ready to push. What. The. Fuck? Didn't even have a time to give me a catheter. Yes! Those things freak me out.
That whole you push for like twenty minutes and then your done is a complete lie. I pushed for approximately two and a half hours. It was probably made harder because I couldn't feel anything from the waist down except for some horrible pressure in my hips and the urge to poop myself.
It was all worth it. At 2:24 am on November 8th, Lorelei Jane was brought into the world and she is perfect.

She is fifteen days old and I can still just lie there staring at her for hours. I didn't think it was possible for me to love someone as much as I love her.

NFL Picks, Week Eleven

2009-11-19T19:42:00.003-06:00

This is the pick for the early game:
MIA at CAR: I don't like teal, but I also don't like bad teams. Dolphins.

Sunday picks coming later! EDIT: Sunday picks added 10 am CST.

IND vs BAL: As much as it pains me to pick the team with the boring logo, the records don't lie. Colts

WAS vs DAL: I will never ever pick Washington. Ever. Cowboys

CLE vs DET: There are no winners in this game. Lions

SF vs GB: Wow. Boring logos all around here. Gold pants for the win. 49ers

BUF vs JAX: We all know how I feel about teal but the Bills really let me down last week. Jaguars

PIT vs KC: This is hilarious. Steelers

SEA vs MIN: How I hate to continue picking Brett Favre to win. But purple is vastly superior to many shades of ugly green. Vikings

ATL vs NYG: I like red. Red is nice. Falcons

NO vs TB: I don't need to dignify this with a comment. Saints

ARI vs STL: I do love me some sexy Kurt Warner action. Cardinals

SD vs DEN: Lighting bolt versus flaming horse head. I think the choice is clear. Broncos

NYJ vs NE: I wonder how much of the commentary in this game is going to be them talking about whether or not Bill Belichick made a mistake last week. Patriots

CIN vs OAK: I will continue to pick the Bengals. For funsies. Also the Raiders suck. Bengals

PHI vs CHI: Have you ever noticed that both of these teams abbreviations are greek letters? Eagles

TEN vs HOU: Why is this the Monday night game? Texans

NFL Picks, Week Ten

2009-11-12T19:47:00.003-06:00

CHI at SFO: Who in their right minds would pick the Bears? I'm not a big fan of golden pants, but a logo with two letters beats a logo with one letter. 49ers

More picks later this week.

EDIT:
Here are picks for the early games (picks posted at 12:00 PM CST)
ATL at CAR: I don't like teal. Falcons.
TB at MIA: Disregard my previous reasoning in this case: Tampa Bay sucks. Dolphins.
DET at MIN: Heh. Vikings.
JAX at NYJ: Re-establishing my hatred of teal, plus the Jags are not a very good team. Jets.
CIN at PIT: I'll just keep picking the Bengals, I guess. Bengals.
NO at STL: Oh, that's HILARIOUS. Saints.
BUF at TEN: Leaping bison, as a logo, are interesting, possibly even more interesting than the flaming thumbtack of the team from Nashville. Bills.
DEN at WAS: Uhm, Broncos.

Late game picks come later.

EDIT: Late game picks!
KC at OAK: Brian tells me both teams will be wearing their old AFL uniforms. The Raiders' uniforms are less hideous than the Chiefs' are, so I pick the silver and black. Raiders.
SEA at ARI: One team is good and wears classy colors, the other is bad and wears four shades of sea green. Coincidence? I think not. Cardinals.
DAL at GB: Tough call. I guess it's a bit of a toss-up, so Packers.
PHI at SD: Philadelphia is a better team. Eagles.
NE at IND: Apparently, this is a major rivalry or something. The Patriots have a better logo, so where's the competition? Patriots.
BAL at CLE: The Browns are just terrible. Ravens.

Pooped.

2009-11-12T10:38:00.003-06:00

Long winded posts are probably coming soon; so, to my (two) dear readers: keep your eyes out for that. Right now I just want to share that I am completely pooped. Lorelei turned 4 days old this morning and it has been a busy and extremely rough four days. Newborns are hard. Anyhoodle. Here's a picture of the sweet baby.

I'm a mother!

2009-11-08T04:08:00.002-06:00

In exchange for what I just did, I think I should get a perfect score this week. I know I won't, but I think I should.

Anyway, I'm listing the picks. And stuff. I have a beautiful baby daughter, who cares about football?

WAS at ATL: Falcons
ARI at CHI: Cardinals
BAL at CIN: Bengals
HOU at IND: Colts
MIA at NE: Patriots
GB at TB: Packers
KC at JAX: Jaguars
CAR at NO: Saints
DET at SEA: Seahawks, I guess.
SDG at NYG: Chargers
TEN at SFO: 49ers
DAL at PHI: Eagles
PIT at DEN: Broncos

At Least Buy Me a Drink First

2009-11-05T14:29:00.004-06:00

The weird and, let's face it, annoying part of being pregnant is that suddenly a woman's body is public property. Everyone is always up in your business and strangers think it's totally okay to touch your stomach. Now, I don't mind too much when people touch me if I know them. Husband? He better like touching my stomach or he's gonna get punched. Friends? Naturally. Former co-workers? Sure, I guess. My baristas at Borders? Well, I'm pretty attached to them since they are the providers of caffeine; so, if they really wanted to. Random strangers in the mall? Absolutely not. Fortunately this only happened once and, at least, she only rubbed my arm and said how good I looked and didn't touch my stomach but still. Not. Okay.

Also. Random people need to stop asking me when I'm due. I get one of two responses when I tell them. "You look so small still." Oh really. Try carting around 30 extra pounds all of which is centered in one small part of the body on top of my pre-existing back problems and sciatica and then tell me I look small. The other, more surprising one is, "Are you sure there is only one in there?" Yeah. Way to make a pregnant woman feel good about herself. Fortunately, this only happens when I'm wearing my sweatpants which do nothing to hide my enormous belly unlike all my other pants which have this weird slimming effect. Hmmm. Maybe I should stop wearing sweatpants in public.

Yeah right.

And then there are the doctors. Warning: I'm about to talk about my OB appointments. If you are in any way squeamish about this or just don't want to know: stop reading right now.

I go to a group practice. This means that there are five or six doctors who I see on a rotating basis. As nice as it would be to only see one doctor and build some sort of relationship with them, it would be very unlikely that they would be the one to deliver baby. One person cannot be in Labor & Delivery 24 hours a day and I would at least like to know who the doctor is when I deliver. Up until last week, I had met all but one of them. And wouldn't you know it, I have entered the phase of them checking my cervix every time I'm there. Hoo boy. Is that fun or what? So, this was the first time I was meeting this doctor and after about five minutes its like, okay, now I'm going to check out your lady parts. Umm. Hi. Shouldn't you at least buy me a drink first? And apparently, when I'm in labor, there will be random nurses who will be doing the same thing. Seeing as I'm sharing the same body with another living being, can my lady bits at least be somewhat off limits? I guess that would make delivery somewhat more difficult.

Just two more weeks...

38 Weeks

2009-11-04T09:41:00.002-06:00

Does anyone know what a beached whale sounds like? Well, that's how I feel and I need to know so I can make that noise whenever I try to roll over in bed. Almost there (I hope).

I hope...

2009-11-03T14:43:00.003-06:00

...that my daughter is less needy than my cats. There are some days that I swear if I hear Josephine yowl one more frickin' time I'm going to throw her out the front door and not let her back in again.

On Sunday, we finally put up the door to the basement. It was long process mostly because the door was hung before there was carpeting down there and was therefore not the right size anymore. Now, we have a saw. With a super-special laser pointer leveler thingie (very technical term) but we didn't have a work table. Well, this weekend while I lay on the couch in pain, the husband went to Home Depot and procured one. And then we discovered there weren't enough hinges. So we stole one from the basement closet (also currently doorless) but then once the door was up it didn't fit in the top of the frame properly so it was back to Home Depot for some sand paper. I think it was finally hung around 7 Sunday night.

After feeding the cats that night, we decided we needed to test out the door. Our house doesn't have doors except for on the bathroom and between the main part of the basement and the laundry room; so, the cats are used to having pretty free reign. (Also, I tend to not close the bathroom door all the way unless there is someone over at the house with me so even if I'm say on the toilet or in the shower the cats can come in there with me.) At about 12:30 am I had to get up to go to the bathroom because of tiny pea-sized bladder being crushed by baby. After my return there was much yowling and batting at the door. Oh. My. God. It was among the most annoying things ever. I wanted to strangle cats. I was really enjoying not waking up to roll over and being prevented from doing so by a giant tub of furry lard. Oy. Last night was better we went all the way until 4:30 am before the cats became unbearable and at my 2 am bathroom trip there were no cats huddled next to the door. Here's hoping we can make it all night soon because until baby is older they are not allowed to be in the bedroom/nursery while we are sleeping.

P.S. I would never actually harm my cats but one day I did have to to leave the house because they would not fucking leave me alone.

What Keeps Me Up at Night

2009-11-01T13:17:00.002-06:00

The questions I ask:

What do giraffes look like when they hiccup?
Do you think a giraffe burp will lose steam half way up the neck so all you hear is a tiny *brap*?
How do elephants blow their nose? Do you think they stick their trunk in their mouth and then suck the snot out?
If an elephant trumpets and snot comes out accidentally hitting his elephant buddy, do you think they get into a snot fight?

Yeah. I'm weird.

NFL Picks, Week Eight

2009-11-01T07:37:00.003-06:00

Well, the Bengals are on a bye this week, and there are only 13 games to pick. I wish I felt better, but I haven't slept well lately, and I'm really ready to have this baby out of me and into the real world.

HOU at BUF: Bills.
CLE at CHI: Bears, I guess.
SEA at DAL: Seattle will be wearing their all-green uniforms. So, Cowboys.
STL at DET: God, this is just pathetic. The logos tell me it'll be the Rams.
SFO at IND: Colts.
MIA at NYJ: I don't like the colors that the Dolphins wear. Besides, they're acquatic mammals! Jets.
NYG at PHI: You know, I don't know. I gotta say, I don't like the green. Giants.
DEN at BAL: The logos are clear: Broncos.
JAX at TEN: God, they both suck. I'm gonna go with the Titans.
OAK at SDG: Chargers.
MIN at GB: Oh, God. Did you know that Brett Favre is playing in Green Bay as an opponent for the first time? Oh, you hadn't heard? HOW HAD YOU NOT HEARD? It's on every radio station and every sports program and every newspaper and every television series not even related to sports at all! I'm gonna go with the Vikings.
CAR at ARI: The clearly-better team is the Cardinals.
ATL at NO: How can I pick against a fleur-de-lis? Saints.

The Great Closet Debacle of 2009

2009-10-30T15:14:00.004-05:00

I swear I didn't use to be this crazy emotional. Sure, I had some bad days where I would just completely lose my shit and just start crying. This, however, was just ridiculous. Let me explain: I decided that I wanted to reorganize the clothes closet. Notice that I don't call it the bedroom closet because it is actually in our office. 'Why is it in the office?' you may ask. Well, that's because we live in a weird old house and if we had the bedroom where it was supposed to be it would be right smack dab in the middle of the upstairs. And if you wanted to go from the living room to the bathroom or kitchen you would have to walk through the bedroom. Oh, and we have no doors. When I got pregnant, we moved the bedroom downstairs and the office upstairs so we could at least have a small amount of privacy and be close to where we wanted to put the nursery. Yes, the nursery is in the basement but don't worry, now that we have replaced the glass in the lights is actually quite bright. Additional aside, the idiot who lived in this house before us not only painted the basement light blue and bright orange (yes, you read that right: light blue and bright orange) but he also painted the backing of the glass in the light fixtures making the basement ridiculously dark.

Back to the closet. So, it's upstairs in the office. And I've had some crazy weird energy for about one hour everyday and I wanted to clean it out and make it look presentable so if the doors accidentally get left open (*cough*Brian can't close anything *cough*) I wouldn't be totally ashamed of people seeing it. Also, I knew there were a bunch of things that needed to be donated or sold since we don't wear them anymore. It started out fine but about half an hour in, after I'd pulled out all of Brian's clothes and then rehung his dress shirts I was trying to move the tie rack and it hit me in the head. Okay. Not terrible. I'm somewhat clumsy, I can deal with the occasional idiot move. But then, then, I couldn't get it reattached where I wanted it. Also, I had tried calling Brian three times (yes, I'm needy sometimes, I'm pregnant, leave me alone) and he had hit the ignore button every time because I wanted to ask him about some suits I had found in the back of the closet and whether or not he wanted to keep them. So, I left him a really angry message and then dissolved into tears. I am pathetic.

Another side note: I flipping hate this schedule. Brian has to be at work because the stinking scholarship dinner is next week and it's not that I want him to be home all the time, but he takes less vacation time than everyone else in that office and hello I'm giving birth in three weeks, I would occasionally like for him to be home to help me do all the stuff I want to do before then. Most of you don't know that the same dinner was the Thursday after our wedding so we had to wait a week before we could go on our honeymoon and he was working the whole time. Grumble grumble.

Well, I won't bore you all with the details of finally getting the closet put back together, but here are the results:

I know it still doesn't look all that great, but trust me this is a vast improvement. Also, please ignore the tubs you see in the living room, that's just my ceiling leaking all over the place.

NFL Picks, Week Seven

2009-10-25T08:29:00.003-05:00

Still not feeling well (or not feeling well again). Short picks again this week, mostly.

GB at CLE: Some logo beats no logo. Packers.
SD at KC: Chargers
IND at STL: hahahahahahah. Colts
MIN at PIT: Purple is so much better. Plus, the Steelers are kind of sucking it up this year. Vikings.
NE at TB: Battle of the two-letter-abbreviation teams! Patriots.
SFO at HOU: Last week showed that the Texans' logo, a two-tone cow skull, is superior to the Bengals' logo of a stripey B. This week will show that it's better than the letters S and F inside an oval. Texans.
NYJ at OAK: Although the Raiders' logo is better, I can't ignore the fact that A) they suck, and B) their head coach may have tried to kill somebody during preseason. Jets
BUF at CAR: I like the Panthers' logo better than the Bills, even though they wear teal. There are entirely too many teams in the NFL that wear teal or some other form of hideous green. Oh well. Panthers.
CHI at CIN: I'm just gonna keep picking the Bengals, just for funzies. Bengals.
ATL at DAL: Falcons.
NO at MIA: Duh. Saints.
ARI at NYG: Hmmm. Probably the Giants.
PHI at WAS: Snort. Please tell me this isn't the Monday Night Football game. That's pathetic. Who would put Washington on Monday Night Football? Eagles.

Well, I guess I typed a little more than I thought I would. Weird.

NFL Picks, Week Six

2009-10-18T09:44:00.004-05:00

Too tired to be witty or to check my record from last week so here's just a quick pick list

HOU vs CIN Bengals

DET vs GB Packers

STL vs JAC Jaguars

BAL vs MIN Vikings

For your viewing pleasure and just because its fun to make fun of him:

NYG vs NO Saints

CLE vs PIT Steelers

CAR vs TB Panthers

KC vs WAS Redskins

PHI vs OAK Eagles

ARI vs SEA Cardinals

TEN vs NE Patriots

BUF vs NYJ Jets

CHI vs ATL Falcons

DEN vs SD Broncos

The Good List

2009-10-14T16:17:00.007-05:00

I've been a bit of a Debbie Downer lately and for that I do apologize to you, dear readers. So today, despite my heartburn, back pain and sleep deprivation, I'm going to focus on the good things. My list of happy

1. I'm 35 weeks today! That means that I only have about a month left until my due date. We went for my (hopefully) last ultrasound this morning. Everything looks great. She's growing exactly the way she should be and currently weighs a little more than 5 pounds. Also, they did a 3D Ultrasound for the first time. She looks like an actual baby and not just a blob!

2. Tiny baby clothes. So I admit to going a little crazy at Gymboree the other morning and then suffered from extreme guilt and buyer's remorse. However, I took back all but one thing and now I feel a lot better. Look at how cute this jacket is though:

3. The movie Stardust. I know I've mentioned it before, but right now this is my favorite movie. People always say that if a movie (or music, book, etc) puts you to sleep, you must not like it very much. I beg to differ. There is something very comforting about this movie. It's like a warm blanket of happy and, if I'm having trouble sleeping, all I have to do is turn it on and I'm asleep within five minutes. Now, if only I could figure out a way to set my DVD player to repeat so it would stay on all night and the menu music wouldn't wake me up.

4. I finished my first knitting project in about two years. Granted I haven't actually worked on anything in a very long time, but it's still nice to have something completed and I can say, "Look what I made! Aren't I cool?" In addition, I have plans for future projects. I'm going to make a matching hat to go with this scarf (eventually) and currently I'm working on a tiny purple baby scarf which will also have a matching hat. My friend Cecily lent me a book of Harry Potter themed projects for an easy hat pattern and I want to make Hermione's knitting bag too!

5. Del Monte Fruit Chillers. I could eat an entire box of these in one day, they are so delicious. Plus, it's made with real fruit so bonus nutritional value!

6. Grilled cheese sandwiches and alphabet soup. I feel like such a kid when I eat this, but it's so tasty! Unfortunately, I don't make very good grilled cheese sandwiches. I know what you are all thinking: How hard is it to make a grilled cheese? Not very hard, but my dear husband makes them much better than I do so I only get to eat them when he's home for lunch.

7. I got a random refund from my old student health insurance (seriously, the charges were from 2002). WTF? Awesome though!

8. Borders' Iced Hazelnut Toffee Mocha. Do I need to say more? Even substituting decaf espresso for the cold-brewed coffee, it is still one of the tastiest beverages on the face of the planet.

Well. That completes my list of happy. I leave you all with my weekly (sorta) picture. Here I am at 35 weeks.

Also note, that sweater is not a maternity sweater. It is one I bought from H&M about two years ago, but it is so long and big and schlumpy that it still fits over my eight month pregnant belly. Awesome.

Alien!

2009-10-14T09:26:00.000-05:00

This is what it feels like is going on in my uterus right now:

Food!

2009-10-12T18:06:00.003-05:00

Behold! Lamb with Mint Ragout. Brian added his to some spaghetti while I ate it straight up. Delicious!

NFL Picks, Week Five

2009-10-10T19:32:00.004-05:00

It's that time of the week again friends! Last week I went an astounding 12-2, beating Brian by one game. Suck it!

CIN vs BAL: My heart wants the Bengals to win, especially because of crazy old Chad Ochocinco, but I know history is against them. And purple beats orange. Ravens

CLE vs BUF: After being trounced by the Dolphins last week and because the Browns almost beat Cincinnati, I have no faith in Buffalo anymore. Although it pains me because their logo sucks I have to go with Browns

WAS vs CAR: Sucky team versus suckier team. Hmmm. Panthers

PIT vs DET: Ha! Steelers

DAL vs KC: I will continue to believe Kansas City will lose because they don't have Dick Vermeil anymore. Dallas

OAK vs NYG: Ha! Giants.

see more Sports Pictures

TB vs PHI: Ha! Eagles

MIN vs STL: Ha! (Yes, I'm a broken record) Vikings

ATL vs SF: I like red. But it looks much better with black than with gold. Falcons

HOU vs ARI: Have I ever mentioned that I think Kurt Warner is a sexy bitch. Just kidding. Cardinals

NE vs DEN: So I tried to find the Hank Scorpio episode of The Simpsons where Homer is given ownership of the Denver Broncos, but I was unsuccessful in finding it on YouTube. Let's just say Patriots

JAC vs SEA: It's just a field of teal out there isn't it? Jaguars

IND vs TEN: Apparently the Titans really suck this year even though they were quite good last year. Colts

NYJ vs MIA: I laugh at the Jets because they lost to the Saints last week! However, the Dolphins are the Dolphins. Jets

Two Years

2009-10-07T13:29:00.009-05:00

Two years ago today Brian and I finally made it legal after almost six years of dating. I remember waking up at my friends house and being picked up by my sister to get my hair done. I remember that it was 95 degrees outside. I remember thinking that I had brought this on myself because I had been hoping so much for a warm day so we could get married outside. I remember shaking while my dad and I sat in the carriage before the ceremony. I remember good friends and good times. I remember walking through the hotel lobby in my wedding dress and people giving us knowing looks. I remember soaking in the giant bathtub in an attempt to get all the hairspray and makeup off of me. I remember being so tired that we both fell asleep long before midnight. It was the best day of my life. In two years we...

1) Went to Antigua for our honeymoon where I managed to avoid getting a sunburn for four whole days

3) I started a two new jobs. Neither of them provided less stress than working for CPK but for awhile at least the schedule was better. (Until I was opening 5 days a week that is)

2) Went to Las Vegas for cousin Steve's graduation from culinary school. I smashed the viewfinder on my digital camera the first day. It turns out disposable cameras are not that bad.

4) Went to New York for Jeff and Helen's wedding

5) Had a six month string of really crappy things happening. Our basement flooded, our roof had to be replaced, our house got robbed, I got sciatica and an intestinal parasite and I got into a car accident and totaled my car.

6) I went back to school.

7) I got pregnant. This is what I looked like just a few months ago:

8) Went to Florida for Karen and Adam's wedding.

Happy two years to my silly husband!

Tired

2009-10-06T14:18:00.001-05:00

I'm tired. Tired of being tired. Tired of feeling nauseous. Tired of not being able to sleep at night because no position is comfortable. Tired of this feeling of panic because I have no idea what I'm doing. Tired of feeling like I've made no progress in cleaning the house. Tired of not being ready. Tired of waiting for the stinking nursery furniture to get here. I'm tired of being pregnant and yet I'm so not ready for a baby.

Ack.

Confession

2009-10-04T10:58:00.003-05:00

I like young adult novels. There, I said it. I'm a 27 year old woman who reads young adult. In my defense, however, there is a lot of really good stuff out there right now. (Of course there is also some really really bad stuff out there. *cough*Twilight*cough*. Which I do admit to reading because it's like crack. You know its bad for you but you just can't stop yourself).

My most recent find is The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins. I also have a weakness for dystopian fiction (Aside: another great dystopian young adult series is Uglies by Scott Westerfeld) so I really couldn't help myself. I really suck a summarizing novels but, in essence, two teenagers from each of the 12 districts in this society are chosen to compete in a reality television death match. Only one is allowed to survive. It's is supremely fucked up but fantastic. I finished the whole thing in one day because I could not put it down. And then there is a sequel (Catching Fire, in case you were wondering) and although I highly recommend you read both you will be supremely frustrated when you finish the second book because the third one isn't out yet!

Another note: How to trick your husband/significant other into reading this book, don't tell him the narrator is a girl. That's right. I got Brian to read it and he liked it. Ha!

NFL Picks, Week Four

2009-10-03T17:51:00.003-05:00

Last week I posted my best record yet of 12-4. Hooray for me.

DET vs CHI: So apparently Detroit won last week for the first time since 2007. Goody for them. That still doesn't make them a good team seeing as they lost to Washington. I'm gonna have to go with the orange C. Chicago

CIN vs CLE: Ha! Cincinnati

OAK vs HOU: Is Oakland good this year? I don't really know or care. The rules of the logo clearly state that the bull with a Texas flag should win. Houston

SEA vs IND: Hrm. I don't have much faith in the Seahawks. Plus, did you see the hideous lime green uniforms they were wearing last week? Indianaoplis

TEN vs JAX: How is it that the Titans have yet to win a game this season? Weren't they pretty good last year. Hmm...maybe this will be the week. Plus the Jacksonville logo is kinda ugly. Tennessee.

NYG vs KC: Ha! Giants.

BAL vs NE: If Bill Belichick wears his awesome headband and cut-off sweatshirt this game is an easy win for New England.

TB vs WAS: Oh Washington! You lost to the Detroit Lions last week and won against the Rams the week before entirely on field goals. Plus your logo sucks. Tampa Bay.

BUF vs MIA: Dolphins might not be able to run on land and we're still working on those hands instead of flippers for catching. But at least they are more graceful than Buffalos. Miami.

NYJ vs NO: For some reason all the analysts think the New York Jets are the gods' gift to football this year. But Drew Brees is probably the best quarterback in the NFL. And is damn sexy to boot. New Orleans.

DAL vs DEN: Denver has a better logo. Flaming horse mane anyone? And I'm so over hoping the Cowboys won't totally suck. Denver.

STL vs SF: As much as it pains me to pick the hideousness that is San Francisco's color scheme, I just can't imagine St Louis can win. San Francisco. And then there is this:

see more Sports Pictures

SD vs PIT: Come on Steelers. Pull yourselves together this week. For me. Pittsburgh.

GB vs MIN: Oh dear. If I have to listen to them talk about this game anymore I think I might scream. Yes, Brett Favre is competing against the Packers for the first time. Blah blah blah. I don't want to get into it so let's just say I like purple. Minnesota.

In other news, Brian just got back from Philly last night and already he is gone again. Sad Kirsten.

Kirsten, Budgeting Queen!

2009-10-02T13:43:00.004-05:00

Ever since losing my job or, more accurately, after having to quit because of my ankle injury, I have become a housewife. Also, uber-cheap shopping queen! For the longest time, I avoided store brands, not because I thought they would be worse than name brand products but because I was not familiar with the store brands here (aka Schnuck's). At home in Washington, I knew what I was getting when I bought a store brand and had become pretty comfortable with it. The change came when I realized that every cent I could save would be a massive help financially and it all started with the store-brand waffles. Half the cost of Eggos and just as tasty! As an aside what is up with the 16 pack of waffles being three times as much as the ten pack? That does not make economical sense. Usually, when one buys a larger quantity package, the price per unit would go down. Weird. Anyway, now I go out of my way to see if there is a store brand of whatever item I'm buying and I check to see if it is in fact less than the name-brand. (I did crack and buy Quaker brand oatmeal because Shcnucks didn't have Strawberries 'n Cream except in the variety pack. Poopers.) Yep. I am super cheap!

Are you bored yet? Well, how about we talk about freezing things? I like to put stuff in the freezer. Pita bread, hamburger buns, leftover meat. Not cooked meat of course, just whatever I didn't need for a recipe but couldn't buy in a smaller quantity. Currently in there: cheese ravioli, one steak, turkey breast tenders, veggie burgers (homemade), pita and burger buns, waffles and fruit pops. Also frozen berries for my smoothies. Another good trick. Giant tub of Schnucks yogurt is really cheap, add a little bit of milk and frozen fruit of your choice and you get a delicious smoothie snack which costs way less than it would if you bought it out.

Now, if only I could make myself always want to cook because there are days when I would much rather just go out and have someone else make my dinner for me. Still have to work on that, but I'm getting there.

Grace and Toy / 33 Weeks

2009-09-30T16:27:00.002-05:00

This is Grace with probably the cat's new favorite toy. We've actually had it for awhile, having bought it last year at the Lake. At least, I think that's where we got it from. This picture is a less psycho-looking version of what she looks like when she plays with it.

33 Weeks! Yes, I know I look pretty small still. It just annoys me when people point that out. I want to scream: "You try carrying this thing around!" Ugh. And this morning it was cold enough outside to wear a sweater. I love Fall.

The Rules of Logos are Simple and Finite...

2009-09-26T21:22:00.004-05:00

...any Cosmo girl would know!

That's right, Elle Woods is the inspiration for the quote bragging about me getting a 10-6 record last week on my NFL picks - including the surprising upset loss by the Green Bay Packers to the perennial suckfest that is the Cincinnati Bengals. Are the Cincinnati Bengals? Be? Am?

Whatever. Grammar is hard. On to the picks!

WAS at DET: Eurgh. Both teams suck (the Redskins beat the Rams entirely on field goals last week!), but the Redskins' logo is slightly better. Redskins.
GB at STL: The Packer logo is spectacularly worse than the Rams' is, but even I know better than to bet on the Rams. Packers.

An aside: Jason LaRue is obviously white trash, but at least he doesn't have a mullet - his hair is the same length all the way around.

SFO at MIN: I just hate Brett Favre when he wins, but the logos don't lie. Vikings.
ATL at NE: You know what? I LIKE the Patriots' logo - it looks like a flying Elvis! Patriots.
TEN at NYJ: The Titan logo is, for all intents and purposes, a thumbtack that looks like it's on fire. Plus, I can't in good conscience pick the Jets, having been crippled by having their quarterback Chad Pennington as my fantasy football team starter for so long, even when he sucked (he's with the Dolphins now, and is apparently much better). Titans.
KC at PHI: It's the Chiefs. Even if Donovan McNabb doesn't play, it's the Chiefs. Eagles.
NYG at TB: Even though the Giants' logo is lame, it's a classy kind of lame. Plus, I like blue! Giants.
CLE at BAL: Hahahahahahahahahah! Ravens
JAX at HOU: Houston did win last week, and I picked them to win, like a crazy person. I'm picking them again, just for funzies. Plus, their logo is like the flag of Texas, and if you don't like the Texas flag, you're a terrorist! Texans.
NO at BUF: Hahahahahahahahahah! Saints.
CHI at SEA: Seattle's going to be wearing their hideous sea foam green uniforms. Green shirts, green pants, light-green piping. Ewwww. Plus, ask me sometime about high school and all the douchebags in their Seahawks windbreakers. They may have a better logo, but the terrible outfits cancel those out. Bears.
PIT at CIN: I like the leaping gay cat logo, and the fact that there's a player named "Ochocinco" (yes, "eight-five") on the roster. Bengals in a HUGE upset.
DEN at OAK: Stylized horse > pirate dude. Broncos.
MIA at SDG: The Chargers may be overrated, but again, Dolphins can't run on land, and don't even have hands - how can they catch a forward pass? Chargers.
IND at ARI: Kurt Warner is so sexy, in that old man who's not a total douchebag like Brett Favre kind of way. Cardinals.
CAR at DAL: The Panthers have a better logo, but they're so terrible, the logo can't help. Cowboys.

By the way, Brian is bragging about his 12-4 record last week in his picks league. But he's such a dork he joined a picks league, so what does he know?

Sleep Deprivation is Fun!

2009-09-24T13:56:00.004-05:00

I have entered that wonderful time in pregnancy where sleeping has become extremely difficult. This is for two main reasons. 1) I have to pee all the freakin' time. I mean seriously, four times in one hour. That seems a bit excessive and yet there you go. 2) Whenever I lay down - and I do mean whenever, it could be 2 in the afternoon - baby girl decides that would be the best time to practice her jazzercise routine. Its like a disco in there. I would not be surprised to find that she has hung a miniature mirror ball in my uterus and is doing some sweet moves from Saturday Night Fever.

I was so tired from lack of sleep last Saturday that I was reduced to tears (yes, actual tears) because all I wanted was to take a nap. Just a couple of hours of uninterrupted sleep. That's all I was asking for. If you don't believe me, ask Brian. It was awful and no, I did not in fact get any sleep that day either.

Perhaps this is my body's way of preparing me for when she's born and doesn't sleep for more than a few hours at a time and my sleep schedule has to correspond with hers. I'm telling you though, I see a very cranky Kirsten for the foreseeable future.

Also, simply by walking one block from my car to the London Tea Room for Knitty Knerds last Friday, I have managed to reinjure my ankle. Its not as bad as when I first hurt it but there are times when I feel shooting pain up my leg. Fun.

Man, I'm such a whiner sometimes.

NFL Picks, Week Two

2009-09-19T21:08:00.005-05:00

Last week, using my fantastical tactic of picking pro football game winners based almost entirely on their mascots, I compiled a record of 9-7. I'll keep track of my cumulative record throughout the season unless I get sick of this.

On to the picks!
CAR at ATL - This is a difficult choice - they have equally good logos. However, the Atlanta home uniform of black pants (slimming!) with black shirts and red trim is a far better choice, fashion-wise. Falcons.
MIN at DET - I hate Brett Favre. I hate him - I hate him! But the likelihood is that he'll win, because it's the Lions, and the Vikings do have a better logo than Detroit. Vikings
CIN at GB - I don't like the Packers, either, but I know they'll probably win, because it's the Bengals. But I do like the Bengals' leaping kitty logo! Bengals
ARI at JAX - I have faith in Kurt Warner, because he's old and still playing, but not as annoying as Brett Favre. Cardinals.
OAK at KAN - The Chiefs' logo is really hideous, and the Raiders made a show of it last week against the apparently-overrated Chargers. Plus, the Chiefs don't have Dick Vermiel anymore, who amused me because he always looked like he had to poop, but did win a Super Bowl with one team and took another to one 20 years before. So, Raiders to win.
NE at NYJ - Cut-off hoodies for the win. Patriots.
NO at PHI - The Saints have a better uniform. I don't like that green crap the Eagles wear - what is that, sea foam? It's just as bad as the Seahawks (more on this later). Saints.
HOU at TEN - Houston still has a better logo. I like the flag inside the longhorn skull. Brian tells me the Titans are a much better team, but I don't care. I know the Texans suck, but still pick them. Texans.
STL at WAS - I have a whole lot of "meh" for this game. I guess Rams.
SEA at SFO - I really hate the 49ers' uniforms. Gold pants? What is this, the 70s? Is this Studio 54? No, this is the NFL. Lucky for the Seahawks they'll be wearing their road whites! Seahawks.
TB at BUF - That frickin' buffalo is pretty ugly. You can't deny that. Buccaneers.
PIT at CHI - In this case, you have the choice of weird sparkly painty bits in a white circle versus a boring orange "C." OooOOoOOoOOOoooOOOo. Steelers.
CLE at DEN - It's the Browns. There's nothing exciting about them whatsoever, so I have to always pick against them. And the Browns will probably be terrible, so I have better-than-even odds of being right. Broncos.
BAL at SD - I hate the lightning bolt, so I have to go with the Ravens. Seriously, a lightning bolt? Even the name "Chargers" is kind of lame. What kind of team mascot is a charger? Is it, like, a horse? A supercharger from a car engine? A battery charger? Ravens.
NYG at DAL - Neither logo is a very good choice. But maybe people will keep kicking things into the giant screen, so the Cowboys have a home field advantage there. Cowboys.
IND at MIA - Nobody would pick Miami. Brian tells me they made the playoffs last year. I don't care - it's the dolphins. They may be the most intelligent creatures on earth, but they aren't supposed to be on land, and I'm relatively certain they can't kick a field goal. Colts.

Couldn't Have Said it Better Myself

2009-09-18T12:48:00.003-05:00

Normally, I avoid editorials but this article on CNN caught my eye. In essence, it criticizes the self-centered, me-first world we live in. I wish I could have written this. As someone who has worked in various forms of food-service where we basically have to treat every customer as the most important person there and put up with them being anything from rude to downright cruel, I could not agree more. At what point did we decide it was okay to make another person cry (and yes, I have cried on more than one occasion at work) just because something didn't go our way? When did it become okay to look down on someone just because they have a job that you consider demeaning? If no one worked in food service or as a janitor or as a gardner, where would we be? Just because we don't make huge salaries does not make us any less of a person than you. In fact, I'm going to come out and say it, we are more important than you because we keep the world running and make your lives easier. There I said it.

/end rant

31 (Almost) Weeks

2009-09-14T18:15:00.004-05:00

The lighting in my bathroom sucks, but that's the only place in the house with a mirror so...there you go.

Oh My Neighbors!

2009-09-13T14:03:00.003-05:00

Sometimes I hate where I live. People here have no idea how to behave properly. For example, the kids like to play "kick ball" in the street and they have on more than one occasion come very close to hitting my car. While I realize that this is an urban neighborhood and there aren't a lot of front yards for the neighborhood youth to play in that does not make it okay to play in the middle of the street. Right next to my car!

That's not what I really wanted to complain about. Why is it that people think it is okay to sit in their car with the windows rolled down blasting their stereo late into the night? This has happened on more than one occasion and it was different cars every time; so, it was probably different people each time. Oi. And it is always when I have to get up early the next morning. If you must blast your music could you at least do it inside someone's home and not right outside my house? Thank you.

Also, yes that was me that called the cops.

NFL Picks, Week One

2009-09-11T13:16:00.003-05:00

So. Brian used to do his picks on his blog every week and although he is not doing that anymore, I thought I'd keep the tradition alive. Only my picks will be based almost entirely on who has the better mascot/logo. It's got to be at least as accurate as any other way.

TEN vs PIT: Technically, this game happened yesterday. But since no one in their right mind would pick the Titans over the reigning Super Bowl champions, I'm counting this as a win for me. Pittsburgh

MIA vs ATL: This is a bit of a toss-up for me since neither the falcons nor the dolphins is a particularly exciting mascot. But since I think the Atlanta logo looks better, I'm going to pick them. Atlanta.

KC vs BAL: This one's easy. Ravens definitely better than the chiefs, mascot wise. Baltimore.

PHI vs CAR: On the one hand, I personally like the Carolina logo better. On the other hand, I think the Eagles might be a better team. On the other hand (yes I have three hands), the Eagles signed Michael Vick who is a bit of dog killing asshole. So, just for kicks I'm going to go with Carolina.

DEN vs CIN: The Bengals are a totally better mascot than the Broncos, unfortunately their logo is a bit lame. Hmm...plus they probably won't win cause they're just that bad. Then again, Brian might be upset with me if I didn't pick them to win so...Cincinnati.

MIN vs CLE: Here's another hard one. The Browns is a terrible name for a team. Then again the Vikings signed Brett Favre who I personally believe needs to just give up. I mean, dude, seriously, you're old and past your prime. Let it go. So I have to go with Cleveland.

NYJ vs HOU: Just to be contrary, even though I know the Texans will probably lose, I like their logo better. Houston

JAC vs IND: Again, the Jaguars logo is better, but I know they are a much worse team and have lost their last three (I think) games against the Colts. In this case though I'm going with Indianapolis.

DET vs NO: No contest here really. New Orleans.

DAL vs TB: There are too many teams, so from now on I'm just going to give my picks and forget the commentary. Tampa Bay

SF vs ARI: Arizona. Also, duh because they were in the Super Bowl last year and I can't remember the last time the 49ers were any good

WAS vs NYG: New York.

STL vs SEA: Hmm...my adopted home town team or my former "home town" (being the closest team to Vancouver)? Decisions, decisions. Seattle

CHI vs GB: Da bears.

BUF vs NE: New England. I mean seriously, who would pick Buffalo?

SD vs OAK: Another no brainer. San Diego.

That's all folks. We now return you to your regularly scheduled blog.

And the Results...

2009-09-10T12:12:00.003-05:00

Brian Boitano's Coq-Au-Vin-Guine:

Do I Talk About Food Too Much?

2009-09-09T16:03:00.003-05:00

I think maybe I do. Perhaps it is because of this thing I'm growing in my tummy that makes me hungry all the time. Anyway. Tonight Brian and I are going to tackle a recipe from What Would Brian Boitano Make? (if you haven't watched it, you are totally missing out on some excellent ridiculousness) Check out the recipe here

August Wrap-Up

2009-08-31T09:35:00.004-05:00

It has been an interesting month. Bookended by visits to the hospital/emergency room and in the middle lots of working and not sleeping and feeling like poop. Yup.

Now, I am unemployed. And in all honesty, I don't think I'm going to go back to [redacted] after little one is born. There was too much drama and guilt tripping going on. I'm sorry that I'm pregnant and some days I'm not functional and that means you have to change your plans or miss your day off but it is your restaurant and it is not my fault that I was the only employee you had left and you hadn't even thought about hiring anyone else. Did you think I was going to just pop the baby out and come back to work the next day? And sorry I fell down my front stars and effed up my foot (for a full account of the incident, see the husband's blog) and you had to close early one night because you had tickets to the theatre. Shit happens. And trust me, it sucked way more for me than it did for you. /end rant

I suppose it hasn't been all bad. Little one seems to be growing normally despite only having two vessels in the umbilical cord (apparently, this is pretty common, who knew?) and I don't have gestational diabetes. Whoo. I upped my dosage hopefully for the last time and, at least for the last few days, have been feeling much better.

Brian and I have been cooking a bit more in the last couple weeks. The tomato soup was not a great success, but if you dipped grilled cheese in it, it was much better. We made jambalaya courtesy of a mix from the Soulard spice shop and some delicious Andouille from the Soulard meat market. Also there is a pound of ground lamb in the freezer just waiting to be made into a fake gyro. We made some delicious chili as well. Unfortunately, Brian left it sitting out overnight and I could not have seconds. Brian, of course, decided it was fine and has been eating the leftovers all week. No signs of sickness yet. Finally, and then I promise I'll be done talking about food, we made cheese ravioli last night with a spinach-artichoke sauce. Sinfully delicious. Plus the recipe made way too much sauce for the pasta, so the leftovers are going to be used as dip for our tortilla chips.

Yesterday, we went to the baseball game cause, you know, free Adam Wainwright bobbleheads. Had to trade in our tickets for handicap seats, but they turned out to be amazing! Right on the first base foul line (or whatever you call it, I don't know all the lingo) and on the first level. Pretty freaking sweet. Oh, and we won!

That's about it. Now, I'm limping around the house doing housework in ten minute bursts because that's about all the time my ankle can be stood on without pain.

A Bit Late: 27.5 Weeks

2009-08-29T10:31:00.001-05:00

Why yes. That is my shower curtain in the background.

Sigh

2009-08-25T17:11:00.001-05:00

...I want a real vacation again.

What? Huh?

2009-08-25T16:18:00.003-05:00

I just discovered that my student loans have been deferred. Now, while this is technically good news since I was planning on calling them in October or November and telling them I wasn't going to be able to pay them for awhile - what with all the baby and not having a job and stuff - I hadn't done anything yet. So the letter they sent me in the mail - that being how I found out about this and then I confirmed it online - said that it was because I was enrolled part-time. And while this is technically true, I was not accepted into a degree program (that I know of because even though I have the application I haven't sent it in yet) and I'm not taking classes right now. So...yeah. Call me confused.

Also, does this mean I can quit working earlier than I thought? God I hope so. So flippin' tired.

Food Ambition

2009-08-21T17:30:00.003-05:00

So. During the day, I watch a lot of Food Network. And I do mean a lot. About the only thing on daytime television (other than soap operas and court shows, which I would not watch if my life depended on it) is reruns of the Daily Show/Colbert Report and food network. And since I tend to watch the Daily Show when it first airs - unless I've already passed out from exhaustion - I watch such high quality television as Guy's Big Bite and Semi-Homemade Cooking. Although I have yet to see anything on either of those two shows that I would actually want to make, I did see something ridiculously delicious on Tyler's Ultimate the other day. Roasted Tomato Soup.

Let me just digress for a moment. During the first few months of my pregnancy, about the only food that did not make me actively nauseous was the creamy tomato soup from Bread Co. I ate it almost every day. Unfortunately, it is a "seasonal" item and it was discontinued for the summer. I don't know why; it was one of the most popular soups on the menu. So, my inside source at B. Co tells me that they are bringing it back soon but I just can't wait any longer. And I really have no desire to set foot in there ever again (despite the delicious new pastries which Desiree has been tempting me with all week).

Okay. Where was I? So this recipe was on his Ultimate Mac-n-cheese show and I just could not help myself. We're gonna make both of them this weekend. Brian and I went down to the farmer's market this morning - it is very strange to be there not on a Saturday, by the way - to get some supplies. We got the tomatoes and the onions and the garlic, but the whole reason why I wanted to go down there instead of to the grocery store was because they usually have herbs for about $1 a bunch. Unfortunately, the farm stand that has the herbs wasn't there today. Grr. Also the recipe seems a bit more complicated than we are used to making. Oh well, keeping my fingers crossed that we don't screw it up too badly. I want me some tomato soup!

Can I Help You?

2009-08-21T17:11:00.001-05:00

Yes. I am that crazy person who likes to take lots of pictures of her cats - especially when Josephine is making her classic, "I'm trying to nap here. What do you want?" face.

Notes from the Last Week

2009-08-19T09:15:00.003-05:00

Brian destroyed our $700 camera on Saturday. Okay. Let's back up a bit here. I was scheduled to work that morning but I was having a bad attack of cramps (fun!) so even though I went in, I left early. Went home, napped a little and ate lunch but then Brian wanted to do something. He was convinced that a little walking around would help ease the pain. So we went to the zoo. I only agreed to the crazy plan because I wanted to see the stingrays - plus, it was late enough that I knew we wouldn't have to park too insanely far from the entrance. Well. Brian had the camera bad on his shoulder but he hadn't closed the clasps; so, when he leaned over the tank, the bag popped open and the camera fell into the water. Yeah. After drying it off, we tried turning it on but the battery started smoking. Generally not a good sign when your camera looks like its about to catch fire. Fortunately, past experience has taught us to always buy the accident protection plan so we took it to Best Buy right away and they sent it off for service. If they can't fix it, we get a new camera. Yay!

Oh. And it didn't really help my cramps feel any better. Good news though, the stingrays loved me. There were like six of them at once trying to get me to pet them. Just call me the stingray whisperer!

Slowly, the basement is becoming more habitable. When we were in Charleston, Brian's parents gave us their under cabinet television that didn't work in their new kitchen and we set it up on top of the dressers so now I can have white noise to sleep to. We also purchased new curtains and sheets. The blanket doesn't really match the new stuff, but I have a cunning plan. Actually, it's not that exciting. We have a plain white duvet which we'll put out once it stops being so hot and save the blanket for when the parents are visiting for the air mattress that they claim they are going to purchase. Brian finally cleaned out the other half of the room so its baby furniture ready. Should be arriving in the next week (I hope!)

In pregnancy news: my back is killing me. Seriously. After finishing my ten hour shift on Monday, I thought I wasn't going to be able to move. After a delicious dinner at Crusoe's (we had a coupon!), I came home and hobbled to the couch where I collapsed for fourteen hours. I didn't sleep the entire time, but it was pretty close. My mother sent me a belly belt that - if yesterday is any indication - actually helps take the pressure off my lower back. Unfortunately, I got it after I got home on Monday. Also, I started having some graphic and terrifying dreams about labor and such (I won't disgust you with the details) and let's just say its got me pretty freaked out. Umm...yeah.

Six months as of Monday. If I didn't hate my dinky camera so much I would post a picture but I just don't feel like dealing with that thing right now. Maybe later.

People are so selfish

2009-08-13T16:50:00.003-05:00

Today I am already in a crappy mood partly because I have the worst acid reflux ever. I mean seriously. It feels like there is either vomit right there at the top of my throat waiting to come out or I have to burp but am completely incapable of doing so. Yeah, fun. Every single time I eat something, this is what I get. Did you know that it is possible to eat too much when you're pregnant? Yeah. I found that out Tuesday night when after a bowl of tomato-basil spaghettini (and nothing else, I swear), I went home and puked up part of it. But I digress.

So.

People are selfish. Today's example: stupid fucking woman and her fucking tiny dog standing in the only available parking space near the apartment building I work in. At first I just thought they were waiting to cross the street because I drove past them to where I normally make a u-turn, but when I come back, she is still standing there; so, I pull up like I'm about to park hoping that she'll get the picture that she needs to move out of the street. Instead she mouths "I'm saving this spot" at me. So, I flip her off. I'm already on the verge of tears because I'm having a bad day. After circling the block and coming back up the street I end up parking what is roughly two blocks away and have to waddle all the way down to work. Lucky for me my ligaments weren't killing me today. Oh wait, yes they were. And then...And then! I waddle through the lobby to the restroom and who do I see sitting there? Yes stupid bitch and her dog. Only now she has a suitcase. Well, good for you lady. I'm glad your friend got to park so close to the building just so they wouldn't have to walk so far to bring you your rolling suitcase.

I really had to resist the urge to walk over to her and give her a lesson in parking etiquette. I don't care if you personally were standing in that spot first. If you are not in a car you are not entitled to "save" a spot for someone. It is a public street and everyone else has just as much right to park there as you do. Ugh. So fucking pissed off.

P.S. Sorry for all the swearing. Sometimes you just gotta let it out.

26 Weeks

2009-08-12T13:07:00.000-05:00

Now I'm off to find some lunch!

Obligatory Animal Post

2009-08-11T19:06:00.005-05:00

Meet Leslie. This is Brian's dad's turtle. He likes to carry around Ray's slippers and his favorite food is Kentucky Fried Chicken. He also likes to nip at people's shoes. Not their feet, their shoes.

On Depression

2009-08-11T17:34:00.003-05:00

Can I be very personal here? I was diagnosed with severe depression in the summer of 2002. In all probability, I was depressed long before then - many years of putting too much pressure on myself to be better than my brother and a horrible high school experience will do that to a person. Add to that a rough roommate situation both freshman and sophomore year, twenty pounds of weight gain and a relationship that my parents were not entirely okay with and you get an emotional mess. I was prescribed Zoloft and was on that at increasing dosages for three or four years before I was switched to Lexapro. Neither was particularly effective, but I was functional. I didn't have severe anxiety attacks and I didn't spend all day everyday wanting to be in bed.

Fast forward a few years. Brian and I had just gotten married and I said to myself, I don't want to be on drugs anymore. I just didn't feel like myself so, without consulting with my doctor I just stopped taking them. I was off medication for a little more than a year and although I did occasionally have bad days, I attributed it mostly to my soul-crushing job at Bread Co. Unfortunately, within a three month period I had to spend a large amount of money I didn't have to repair the roof of our house, our house was broken into and a lot of stuff of both monetary and sentimental value was stolen, I developed sciatica because of my job and then I got into a really bad car wreck and totaled my car. With Brian's encouragement, I went to my doctor and after discussing the reasons why I quit taking drugs in the first place and why I thought they weren't working for me, she prescribed a fairly new medication. For the next couple of months I actually felt almost normal. And then I got pregnant.

So. Because this was a new medication and not an SSRI (which is considered mostly safe to take while pregnant) I had to stop taking it immediately. Since I always list depression on my medical history, my OB at my first prenatal checkup told me that it would be best to take some sort of medication. Apparently the risks of being on medication are the same as having a depressed mother not on medication. Did that make sense? So back to Zoloft it was. A low dose, lower than I was taking before I switched. Okay. Things were going okay. Not great but mostly manageable.

Well. Let's not forget the soul-crushing job. Even after I got pregnant and even after multiple requests, I was still scheduled to open the majority of the days I worked (3 or 4 times a week). That meant waking up at the ungodly hour of 3:45 in the morning. And then I was so rarely scheduled with anyone there to help me I would get so busy I would want to cry and walk out. Did I mention the horrible morning sickness, the insomnia and the return of my sciatica. I was stressed out. There were days when I would cry myself to sleep. Finally, I quit and started working full time at my other job. And while there are bad days there too, it is much less stressful for me most of the time.

I'm getting to the good part, I guess. I spent several weeks having regular panic attacks. If I was out in public somewhere and something went wrong or I wasn't feeling well, I would just start crying. Uncontrollably. There were days I didn't even want to leave the house I was so panicked. Brian took the initiative to call my doctor and she upped my dosage by a small amount. I'm doing better but, even so, if for whatever reason I happen to miss a day the next day will usually be a complete disaster.

All of this is a long way of saying that I struggle. A lot sometimes. And I have no idea how I will be able to handle all this come November. But I do have a really great husband and some pretty awesome friends who I can count on to make me feel better. So thank you.

Rough Week

2009-08-07T09:12:00.005-05:00

Warning: I whine about my pregnancy. If you don't feel like getting a few gory details about this oh so joyous time, you might want to skip this post.

It has been a less than stellar week for me. Started out with a massive anxiety attack on Sunday relating to the final paper for my class. In retrospect, I probably should have started on it earlier than the day before it was due, but I usually work pretty well on a deadline. Apparently, that was not the case this time. Managed to get the bosses to switch their day off with me so I could have Monday to work on it and then relax a little bit. It all worked out okay: paper was sent off and I got an A in the class.

Wednesday I had to work ten hours to make up for the day I missed on Monday. It would have been okay except that I haven't been getting much sleep and my back and muscles have been ridiculously sore. I would be sitting down during a slow time and then have to get up and it felt like my legs were going to give out. There was such a horrible pain in my lower back. And then on Thursday I was almost completely immobile on the couch all morning. I got up to use the restroom and it was so painful to move and I had cramps that were so bad I had to call Brian and have him come home. The original plan was just for him to come bring me some lunch, help me take a shower and get dressed before I had to go to work.

It was a disaster. I think poor husband spent half an hour trying to figure out what I wanted to eat and, when I finally agreed to something, he had just gotten into the car when I called him and told him to come back inside. I didn't want to get up, I didn't want to eat anything. It was just really, really bad. Brian managed to get me into the bathroom and gave me a sponge bath (too much information for you, dear readers?) because I wasn't up to standing for more than a few minutes at a time. Managed to get dressed and went to Benton Park coffee house and I was telling Brian about my cramps and abdominal pain and coupled with the fact that I had barely felt baby move the day before, he freaked out, called the doctor and they wanted me to go to pregnancy assessment.

So.

We went to the sketchy part of Barnes. And by sketchy, I mean the older building which has really ugly wallpaper and decorations. Fortunately, the wait for a room wasn't terribly long. Unfortunately, once I had a room and a nurse had come in and hooked me up to all these monitors, I immediately had to pee. I figured I could wait, which I did for awhile until just as the doctor was getting there I finally said "Screw it, I have to go." So they unhooked the cables and I had to carry them and walk across the hall in my oh so attractive hospital gown. Did I mention that it was really cold in there? Anywho. So got examined. Heartbeat looked good and the little contraction monitor or whatever wasn't picking anything up. So doctor checked my cervix (BTW, that is super fun. Except not) and she said it was nice and closed and really far back so whatever my cramps were, they were probably just mild contractions and there was nothing to worry about. Three hours in the hospital to find out nothing was wrong. I guess that's better than finding out something was really really wrong. I'm supposed to take it easy for the next few days, drink plenty of fluids and keep my feet up. That I can do.

Kitten Love

2009-08-03T16:01:00.003-05:00

Over the last few weeks the cat which is designated "my" cat has become increasingly clingy. She loves to curl up and nap next to me or, more frequently, directly next to or on top of my tummy. It's like she knows.

Cravings

2009-08-03T09:50:00.002-05:00

Foods that I could eat an entire vat of:

Ellen's black raspberry ice cream
Joy of Cooking frozen mashed potatoes with gravy

I also really want some tuna salad but that is unfortunately on the forbidden foods list.

A List

2009-07-31T08:02:00.002-05:00

Things I need to accomplish before November:

Organize the linen cabinet in the bathroom
Paint the bathroom. Yes, a color has finally sort of been decided on: chocolate brown for the walls and white for the cabinets
Put contact paper down in the kitchen cabinets
Unpack the remaining boxes in the basement

City Garden

2009-07-06T10:52:00.005-05:00

In an effort to become more like a real city and attract people to the downtown area, St Louis has completed a green space project. It has fountains and crazy sculptures you can climb on. All that good stuff. Plus its great for pictures.

I foresee many more trips out there in the near future.

A Text Message

2009-06-27T15:29:00.001-05:00

"I Had a dream you were a really badass undercover cop."

It Needs to Be Said

2009-06-26T16:40:00.003-05:00

There is a disturbing trend in facial hair for relief pitchers in major league baseball. I like to call it the tumor beard. Observe. This is Jason Motte of the Cardinals and if I could think of the name of that other pitcher I would link to his picture as well, but alas, his name escapes me at this point in time. Perhaps the husband will think of it. I would like to shave all of their beards.

It just needed to be said.